Yesterday was an interesting day.
The night before was Jax's bday house party, which rocked the casba!

The next morning, I woke up, ate and met up with Bohdan Turok to do a test shoot. We all know how much I love the camera, and it's nice to do some shots that encourage me to try and emote beyond simply happy & cute.

Although, I didn't acheive the grittiness that I wanted, there's a quiet sophistication and elegance that I really am proud of in the photos.




I tried to use my hands as much as I could.

These photos are really eye opening for me. Regardless of whether a woman is perceived as being hard working, there's still a lot of apprehension.

Am I going down the right path? Should I have a career or get married and have children? Do men find me attractive? Am I looking old?


You can't really tell, but, my hair was a wreck that day. I wanted to leave it because I wanted to see what it would look like in photos. Definitly made the haggared old witch look fashionable.

Here's another shot of me hiding. I don't like my face in photos, I love being in front of the camera, but, simply don't ask me if I think I'm pretty. The answer will always be no.

Do I feel less of a person because of it, not at all. I accepted that at a young age. But, if people respond to my look, then more power to you.



Now here are my two favorite photos...

Here's a shot of me just before I got the phone call from a friend telling me that my ex's going away party was that night. At least point I was feeling charming and actually, dare I say it, beautiful.

The call informed me that my ex's leaving for Africa and was being sent off by the people he loves.




Here's the shot of me after that call.
Broken, because I am not one of those people.
...

The girl discarded by the idol, she laments at lost salvation. Closed eyes with upturned hands she will dismiss quick emancipation