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Wednesday, November 30, 2005

The headlines have reported it - Canadian Parliament Fell! Succumbing to a no-confidence vote, the Liberal Party bit its lip and was held accountable for deceiving the Canadian people.

Is this really going to make a change in the government? I'm not entirely convinced about that. While having conversations with my friends about who they are thinking about voting for, the majority stated they would vote for the Liberals - as if there was NO CHOICE!

Canadian apathy rears its ugly head again!

I think it's because young Canadians are tired with leaders that lack charisma. We want Trudeau and we only have the option of Paul Martin, Stephen Harper and Jack Layton. With that line up, it's obvious, we consider the Liberal party the lesser of all the evils.

Think about this: The Liberal Party did not only disappoint Canadians, but, Bono as well. If you don't know what I'm talking about then you're already lost. sorry.

We all know what happened with a Conservative at the helm! We still are trying to heal, not so much over Brian Mulroney's bombastic ramblings that he accomplished more than any other prime minister since Sir John A. MacDonald. But, more trying to heal over his hand in the creation of Ben Mulroney.

If anything, Canadians can unite over our common dislike for Ben Mulroney. I think preventing a future politician's son from polluting our tv screens is reason enough to not vote Conservative. Forget about their overtly archaic policies on gay marriage and marijuana decriminalization! Just know that, like Brian Mulrony, Stephen Harper also has a son named Ben.

CBC polls report that Canadians have little faith in the available leaders. Perhaps, before candidates roll out in their Political Popstar Tour Buses they consider image make overs. Because right now, it's looking pretty good that the Liberals take the helm to steer Canada.

Many Canadians are leary to vote NDP, even though their policies look pretty good. But, Ontarians are fearful due to their less than positive experience being a one time NDP province. I don't blame them! They were left with a shell of a province as they descended into debt. Has this tarred the NDP's to be forever thought of as bad at managing finances? Yes, that seems to be the comments I hear from the older generations.

I won't even comment on the Bloc Québecois. If there is nothing more ridiculous then a seperatist acting as the great Canadian unifier, then I don't know what is!

However, one exciting thing did come from all of this. We were featured on the November 29th episode of The Daily Show with John Stewart!

It was a thrill for me!

For More Information on the upcoming election, party policies and insightful commentary on all things election try http://www.cbc.ca/canadavotes/#

Monday, November 28, 2005

So you want to know the latest trend in dating - celebrity style?

Forget incidious nicknames like Brangelina and Kimberlan! That's out out out! Anyone who is anyone is slummin' it these days!

From Britney Spears to Mischa Barton, they are all giving it a go. Finding parasitic men to adorn your glamourous arm is all the rage, but it does not come cheap! Yes, these men look like their are homeless, but, that doesn't mean they are satisfied sipping Bum Wine while cozying up to a roaring fire in a barrel. These men are not only catagorized by their bad hygene and ability to ride coat tails, but, they enjoy indulging in their partner's accumulated wealth. Be wary! They may cash your money in to pave their way for their own record deal!!

Another characteristic of successfully slumming it is by far the marriage proposal. Your trampy himbo will buy you a gorgeous ring with your own money, propose to you on the vacation you bought and allow you to make all the important decisions for the wedding you will ultimatly pay for. So romantic!! Often these men are serial in their attempt to land a celeb marital partner, take a look at Mischa Barton's new man, formerly engaged to Kimberly Stewart this past year!

So more handy then a wrench, carries more than a purse and costs more then a complete set of Louis Vuitton luggage on a private jet, is Hollywood's hottest trend!

Slumming it!

Thursday, November 24, 2005


So this is Wonderland, is it? Snow criss crossing on its slow decent from the clouds. Slush forming in the gutters on a ice bevelled street. Torontonians cursing vehemently at the sudden appearance of frost on the winshields of their cars. The homeless huddling under laundry vents.

Ah! The eternal beauty of a Metropolitan Winter!

I really think it's the profanity spewing from the mouths of the elderly that really defines the whimsy of the season.

Yes, it can be beautiful if you own a big house in the country. Trimmed for the festive season, everyone is prepared to host parties and sip eggnog by a roaring fire. But, for us city folk, it's dirty, cold and smells like wet dog, every day.

So much for Winter Wonderland! There's no magic for me except the magic of salt and antifreeze on an icy uneven sidewalk!

ick!

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

10:30am the dam broke and the flood waters rushed in. We were trapped, suspended 9 floors above the ground. There was nothing to do but face the rapidly rising water.

Who would've thought that a water main breaking in my hallway would bring a little slice of Hurricane Rita into my downtown Toronto condo!?

I DIDN'T!

IT WAS CHAOS! People yelling, buckets filling, towels wedging, wrenches wrenching and water FLOODING!

After the chaos, I received two pieces of industrial equipment. 1 large and loud heated fan and one tall and blue dehumidifier.

Trust me they are loud, but, they are there to dry out the carpet before it starts to smell like bad!

Monday, November 21, 2005

I'm going to keep this short and sweet!

After talking to a friend of mine today I realized, friends can be unnecessarily harsh when giving advice on relationships.

Take a look at my girlfriend, she was involved with a guy and it turned sour because he wasn't ready for a commitment. Sounds familiar doesn't it? So after this came out, he quickly dropped off the radar to only reappear a few weeks later.

Now they are seeing each other on an "as need basis" as dictated by the guy.

Doesn't sound so good does it? As a friend I immediatly want to go for the jugular! "You're too good for him.", "You don't need that inconsistancy!", "You deserve better than that!" Honestly, it's like I go into autopilot!

But, I hold myself back. It's not about my happiness, it's about my friend's happiness. She's beaming about the apparent step forward towards reuniting as a bonified couple. And, maybe their current state of affairs is simple a phase! A phase that will ease the guy into feeling more comfortable about having a commitment.

So I try to relate, and I offer words of wisdom instead of advice. "If you love him, you should do what makes you happy. If it all goes sour you don't want to look back and think you could've done more. You don't want to have regrets."

In the end, who am I to say my friend's decisions aren't good!
People deserve to be happy!!!
ESPECIALLY my friends!

Friday, November 18, 2005

After a 4 year study, it appears that many individuals in Walkerton who had reported liver problems, developped the ailment not because of the ecoli bacteria found in the water BUT due to drinking too much water!

The study goes on to say that they don't know exactly how much water an individual must consume in order for it to equal too much water.

So in light of the last revelation, scientists may admit that drinking some water infected with ecoli is in fact drinking too much water.

Monday, November 14, 2005

Ever dream of living in a world made out of marshmallows?
I did when I was 5. I never thought that 20 years later I would have a kitchen covered in marshmallow.

That's what happens when you're a domestic goddess making toasted coconut marshmallows from scratch.

I stopped myself from licking the cabinets.

Saturday, November 12, 2005

I now use a blender and the sauce is super fab.

2 egg yolks
pinch of cayenne
pinch of salt
pinch of pepper
tablespoon of water
tablespoon of lemon juice
1/2 cup of butter. Melted and bubbling.

In a blender, blend it all, except butter, together until frothy.
Add the bubbling hot butter in a steady stream into the blender while it is running.
This will emulsify and subsequently cook the raw egg yolks.
In the end you have
HOLLANDAIS THAT DOES NOT SEPERATE AND DOES NOT SMELL FEAR!

And, that my friends, is hot.

Friday, November 11, 2005

So I had a job interview today with one of Canada's pre-eminant dance companies. One that is quoted as being on the "Vanguard of Canada's dance scene". Don't worry, I had to look "Vanguard" up in the dictionary as well.

I think the interview went really well! But, I was shocked to discover that I, one time Miss Toronto, was NOT featured on eTalk Daily! Come on, I thought their gig is featuring Z-List Canadian celebrities in uninteresting segments!?

Who was I beat out by? Amanda Walsh's sparse L.A. digs. Yes, it's true, the one time Much Music VJ left the job that epitomized her as "That Blond Chick on Much Music" to fine tune her grade 9 comic skills. In Hollywood no doubt!

I wish Amanda much luck in L.A.
I wish Brian Mulroony wasn't the most repellent host on Canadian TV.
I wish I get to be the next Much Music V.J.
And, I wonder if the Canadian Tire Guy is laundering his money through Canadian Tire.

Monday, November 07, 2005

There are scratching sounds everywhere! They aren't unique to one area, either! They move from place to place to place... scratching like something's trying to get in!
What IS IT!?

Saturday, November 05, 2005

Oh what a ridiculous notion, I barely ever get stressed. Yes, I was upset when I was let go from RTH (I still believe that was wrong), but, I didn't stress over it. I merely mourned for the world I got to know so well in such a short period of time!

But, recently, I went to a Halloween brunch at Chateau Nice and discovered that stress can exist even if you're unaware of it. In fact, as I discovered that day, stress can manifest itself in bizzarr-o passive aggressive and anally retentive ways.

I freaked out over scrambled eggs.

Say it with me:

Scrambled.

Eggs.

It all happened when I saw a stranger at the helm of eggs at a brunch for close to 50 people. It being noon, and me stressed in a heavy fog of self afflicted hypo glycemia, I said loudly to my friend, "I bet they put dairy with the eggs" I glanced at the large wok filled with scrambled eggs sitting in a murky pool of whey. "Yep," I said, "Sure did."

Then the conversation went like this:

"You put milk with the eggs didn't you?"
"I didn't."
"Then dairy then"
"Sour cream"
"Why would you do that? You see how the eggs seperated, that's bad."
"I know what I'm doing, I'm an expert"
"Obviously not if you put dairy with scrambled eggs. You mess with the proteins. They get-"
"Do you want to take over?"
"No, I want to eat eggs. Can I take some from the top here"
"NO! You want eggs theres some in the microwave cooked"
I think on what those eggs would look like..
"No I want those ones. They're cooked"
"NO THEY AREN'T! I cook them until all the liquid evaporates."
"If you to that the eggs will over cook, turn into nuggets and will be tough!"
"Do you want to take over."
"No, you've obviously got it under control"
I reluctantly accept the egg paste from the microwave and head to eat.

So a rule of thumb:
Never add dairy to scrambled eggs. They will seperate, you will lose moisture from your eggs in bucket fulls.
Yes you add dairy to quiche, but, you also add flour and you don't agitate it.

Trust me.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Screw this obsession with weight! It's starting to mess with my mind! In a world saturated with processed foods, I am the #1 hypocrit!! I lack consistancy in my diet, and I'm sure I'm not the only one!
"Hello, all the ladies in the house that feel guilty after eating a scoop of ice cream!"

Here's the deal, and I've thought about this alot. I'm developing a diet called the "Grade School Diet". I am convinced, that pre-meditated, portion controlled meals throughout the day are the way to go! Get it?! Eat like you're in grade school! Go back to those days when Mum, Dad or Guardian would make your lunches, you rode the school bus into school and Barbie was the coolest accessory to rock your classmates.

For me, a typical day was like this:

1. Wake up, eat breakfast. Normally a breakfast cereal with milk, high in fibre.

2. Get to school, do the morning P.E. Class, afterwards have a snack. Normally, fruit, fruit roll up or granola bar

3. Do more school work... THEN LUNCH! Normally a sandwich or soup, a piece of fruit, some nuts, and a cookie.

4. Finish school, go home & have a snack.

5. Dinner, dessert,

6. Bed.

I mean, how sweet is that routine. It's calculated, it's to the point, it keeps the metabolism burning bright.

Where did it all go wrong? It went wrong when I went to university and I discovered that all those fabulous foods I fantasized about eating in grade school I could FINALLY eat because I didn't have a mother controlling what I was putting in my body.

A typical day went like this:

1. Wake up. "Why, hello cupcake and left over pizza. You're looking very delectable. I'll eat you after I finish this chocolate bar and beer" Repeat throughout the day.

Not good.

So now, screw the supplements! The fad diets and the binging! I'm going to eat healthy!! And, every other day, I'm going to do my own P.E. class!

Dammit, I wish I had one of those parachutes they had in gym class!