"Ass Down, Pillow Up
This is how we F*ck You Up!"

Just overlook the fact that I rhymed "Up" with the same word in the next line.

I'm ready and I'm pumped! It's here, it's huge, and it's all the rage! The most iconic of all chick fights, the grandmama of them all has gotten a sassy new make over and it's hitting a ring near you! Can you handle the brutal wrath of THE PILLOW FIGHT!?

The Pillow Fight League (PFL) is quickly becoming one of the hottest events to take over the metropolis of Toronto. Why? It's pure entertainment! Men come and indulge in the live manefestation of your pubescent fantasies. Women revell in one of the only entertainment sports where men aren't allowed in the ring.

They all might be featherweights but that doesn't mean they can't bring in the heavy.

Face it, boys play fight in the school yard, they punch, they kick, they draw a crowd and get into trouble. What if I told you that girls fight too! I don't want to brag, but, I think we're much more strategic in our frays. We choose to arm ourselves with pillows so that hits are muffled, as are the cries of our victims from the ears of our guardful parents or guardians. As long as people think pillow fights are sweet, then we can continue our uniquely sadistic form of fem-battle.

We've honed our skills over years of girl's nights and slumber parties only to set them aside once we became adults. Thankfully, Stacey P. Case, PFL's saucy Commish has resurrected the passtime as a vixenish martial art only to be duked out in the ring.

I would love to be apart of it except I don't think I could handle one small detail: I don't like to get hit.

So I might never make it into the league, but that's okay! Since the leagues conception in 2004, it has grown to include an impressive roster of 14 PFL fighters, all of whome are prepared to take a punch. PFL is also releasing a DVD, they boast sold out fights, tons of press and they even were invited to take their unique brand of pillow fighting roller-derby to last year's Power Ball.

But, from what I've read and from what I've seen, it is defintly far from a pubescent boy's wet dream. There's nothing overtly sexual about the fights, the girls get in the ring to win. And, to win, they mean by any means necessary... with the exception of eye-gouging, biting, scratching, hair pulling, or low blows. Oh! And, most definitly no loading your case with foreign objects like bricks.

... it doesn't say anything about lacing the pillows with ether though... hmmm, I might be the next pillow fight queen.

Check out this video of Champain VS Boozy Suzy, yeah, the fighters all adopt clever nicknames and alter egos.



I've got my name! Frow SpinStar. German name is cold, the Frau embellishes the OW, and the play on Spinster shows that I have nothing to lose and that I am a star regardless!

If I avoid the blows then I won't get hit. It's brilliant!