Comments/Compliments I've received

"Karma is sweet... but, that girl has the devil in her"

meow.
I like that.
I like that a lot.

Music: Hot Stuff NOT at Canadian Idol!

The Canadian Idol auditions are up in Toronto right now.
I listened to Todd on the Dean Blundell show do his schtick this morning and the sad thing is, everything they said was true. Too many hopefully crowd the lines hoping for a glimpse into a speck of fame.

Chances are one in a million they'll make it. The odds are not good.

I thought I would write a little blog featuring some of the most talented performers that you won't find at the Canadian Idol Audition. Sound good?

Well you get your itchy clicker finger poised and get ready to click click click your way to some good ear candy.

First off:

Nicola Moore - Her talent is undesputed. Sometimes, if you're lucky, you might stumble upon this gem of a performer doing her thing with other artists in the area. She's recording right now, and I can't wait for the album to hit!!

Elizabeth Shepherd - She's very well regarded within jazz circles in Toronto. But, truthfully, her music is so much more. I adore her rendition of "Fly Like and Eagle" and can't wait for her album to hit. She gigs regularly in Toronto and hails from Montreal. A warm spirit with an addictive sound. Check her out and feel free to fall in love.

Christopher Scott Not a Canadian Artist, but, worthy of your attention. I met Christopher at the I Am KMS California finals, and he's a co winner with me. Please, check his website out, his music is very now and very good! I wish him all the best because his talent nearly surpasses his warmth and kindness.

Can you dig it?
I can.
Click it.
Click it now.

The Return to Canada

So the excitement of the KMS California Casting Call is all over. I am one of the six individuals chosen to represent the brand of KMS California hair care products for the next year.

What a trip! Before I left I was thinking of hair strategies, learning how to use the products, studying the KMS California message and then some. I get to New York and before I know it, it's all over and I'm holding a massive bouquet of flowers, chatting it up with Jess Zaino about accessories from H&M and thinking, wait did I really win this contest?

I did!

Here's a photo from the red carpet, Chanel is upfront and she was one of the first people I met in New York and definitly one of my favs. I really look forward to hanging out with her again. Janine, on the right, was a co-winner with me, she's also from Toronto. She's so sweet and very beautiful!


We stayed in Times Square and we rolled in limos and Escalades. We were treated like glamorous superstars for two days and we all loved every single minute of it!

What did I learn about New York? The people are really kind, the lights are bright, there are more taxis than privately owned cars and no one waits for the pedestrian light to flash go before they walk. You cannot find snacks to eat that are cheaper than buying an entire McDonald's meal and the holding area to go up to the top of the Empire State building looks like a dingy DMV with crooked blinds and random old posters pasted on the walls. But, when you get to the top, the view is beautiful!

Will I go back to NY? YES!
Will I continue to use KMS products regardless of being a face of the brand? Yes.
Do I want to meet up with the other contestants again? Damn straight! They were awesome!!!!!!!!

VOTING IS UP! VOTE FOR ME TODAY!

As most of you are well aware, I am a finalist in the I AM KMS CALIFORNIA contest. So come Monday, my friend Tara and I will be travelling to New York City where I will be vying for an opportunity of a lifetime to be one of 6 brand representatives for the uber posh hair care line: KMS California. Winnings will include a one year contract among other things.

Currently, there is an online voting module, which no doubt will have some baring on the final results (otherwise, why would they have it?) Therefore, I'm simply requesting that all of you log into the website:
http://www.iamkmscalifornia.com/ and register to vote for me, Marie, as your favorite contestant.

If you're feeling generous, and want to help me out, then participate in a viral marketing campaign and send this over to any friends to vote for me.

Please vote for me today since the competition is literally on Tuesday.

http://www.iamkmscalifornia.com/

Wish me luck! Send me lots of positive vibes! And, vote vote vote!

All the best,

Marie AKA - KarmaCake

KMS COUNTDOWN: Do You Love My Hair?

Today I went to see my favorite hairstylist in the entire world, Jessie. I wanted to get some tips on how to manage my hair in prep for the big event in New York. Seriously, I want to make sure that my individuality speaks volumes through my hair.

Before I knew it I was sitting in her chair she was pulling out the scissors and I got a gorgeous shag do! Of course, styled all with KMS hair care, my hair smells delish!

Seriously kids, it's shaggy and sexy and it's totally touchable, how does KMS do it? If I knew how they did it I would be doing it and selling it... but, I suppose KMS already has that in the bag.

I go in on Friday for a touch up on the colour, I'd love to post some photos of my hair, but, I think you're going to have to wait for that! I don't know if anyone else out there is googling me like I'm trying to google them.

But, if you're out there, you're looking for a great haircut, a great salon that operates like a family, and a little extra pampering (get a hand massage with some yummy smelling oils), you should really check out Earth Salon on Scollard.
Don't think that this is one of those uber pretentious shi shi poo poo la la Yorkville Salons that spends more time on the cappuccino then the clients! Earth Salon does not do that!
The best salon in Toronto, Earth Salon will give you a chic hair cut you will want to flip and touch all day.
I know they have a website, but, I can't find it right now.
When I do I'll post it, in the meantime call them: 416 923 2784

Until I post again...

NEW YORK IS HAPPENING SOON!

m

Pie... Seaweed Pie! - Downhome Show April 28th - 30

Jesus Murphy! Cannit be true? Shore 'nuff 'tis!
Der's gonna be a Downhome show fer all of us who's gone uppan leff d'east fer away.

Okay, enough of that! Toronto is being transformed into the New East Coast, or Nouvelle Cote D'est as they would say in ACADIE!

The Downhome show, Toronto's Annual Festival of East Coast Culture is on April 28th-30th at the Variety Village (3701 Danforth Ave)!

I know, it's hard to imagine there's more to the East the the fishing n' jigging, the water, the potatoes, the comedy and the Trailer Park Boys. But, I assure you, there is! Simply log into the Downhome Show's website and you'll see that the entertainment is spread over three days and includes appearances by Mr. Lahey and Randy, a Bubbles look-a-like contest and a Miss Downhome pageant featuring true East Coast girls trodding around in hip waders and bating hooks. Huh... well, maybe there isn't more than fishin and Trailer Park Boys...

Oh wait! Yes, there is! I near forgot the drinking! Ne'er weaned from the rigid teet of the brewer's bottle, we're all alcoholics. Of course, Miss Downhome needs to dance a jig without spilling a drop of her Moosehead ale!

Gordon Pinsent is going to be there for the 3 days of beer soaked, oyster shucking, incoherent colloquialisms and so should you!

You might even catch me up on stage trying to figure out how to bate a hook...

Norma is Over the COC moves to the Four Seasons

End of an era at the Hummingbird Centre for the Performing Arts was marked Saturday, April 15th, 2006 with the final performance ever of the Canadian Opera Company at that venue.

The final performance was of Bellini's Norma. It was a first for me to go out on stage to have the accolades of the audience reach highs rarely witnessed in Canada. The applauds were always at hand and the cheers of "BRAVA" were common and fierce! Needless to say the obvious standing ovation that the cast received erupted so earnestly that every single face on stage sported a grin of pride from ear to ear.

It was an honour to be apart of this production!

At the end of the performance, numerous parties dotted the inside of the Hummingbird. One for the cast, another for the crew, it was a marvellous night! Needless to say, us Priestesses needed to get a photo in our street clothes with Analee and Bob Stein. Analee is 50% of the remarkable duo that adminstrates all the supers. She also was a priestess in the former production of Norma at the COC, so we all shared a special little bond with our "den mother".

Thanks for a great run! Thank you to all the folks in the chorus, crew and orchestra who believed that I was 18 year's old.

Next time you catch the COC it'll be in their new home The Four Season's Centre at Queen and University!

Movie Review: Hot 4 Hartnett's Sleven

When and caught "Lucky Number Sleven" at the Paramount this afternoon.
The highlight: Harnett is still hot like fyah.
The downside: Harnett falls in love with Lucy Liu and not me.
Why did that happen? Because I wasn't in the movie.

But, if I was...

I would've been an extra.

Toronto Star gave the film 1.5 stars.
I give the film:

1 Tyra "America's Next Top Model" demo pose and 2 "I'm so hot posing for my webcam" thumbs up.
See pretty much any episode in cycle 5. Anytime, Tyra slips this move into a show, take a drink! Or should I say "Do a Line"? Naomi, I'm talking to you, Girl!

Bossy Ladies WHO IS THE ORIGINAL!?

Besides the fact I like to pretend that I'm narrating videos on Much Music's Video on Trial (ARE YOU LISTENING MR. M. Z?)

I propose the following song as the theme for Ladies everywhere. We can thank Kelis for Milkshake and now my new fav. song Bossy.

Click the link and give the tune a spin. She looks HAWT, lovin' the short hair.

Just a heads up, people at Corus, I hear you, you want to be fly like me. But, getting some "chick in the city" to author the "WTF Blog" and PRETEND that's she's the original and NOT KarmaCake?

Please.

Folks, I am the original WHAT THE FUCK Bloganista.

Giro Toronto: You Too Can Bike the Boot!

My conversation began like this with my friend and Giro Toronto organizer:

there's a building named after my grandfather
really, that's so exciting.
sorbara hall
that's a bit of a thrill
... minor time lapse ...
My office has my name on the door
... another minor time lapse ...
hey, if I sent you a banner ad, would you stick on your blog?

I'm sure you're wondering, what is Giro Toronto. Well if you haven't read about it in the National Post let me shed some light on it for you.

Giro Toronto is a fun filled bike tour that takes participants on an interesting boot shaped tour of the city. Coincidentally, the boot shape isn't just for esthetics! The boot shape actually hits all the Italian neighborhoods in Toronto providing bikers an interesting historical romp through good ol' Hog Town.

Another great part about the race is that all funds raised goes to support Villa Charities. so you'll do something good for your soul, your spirit and your constitution!

So if you can dig it, dust off your two wheeler and sign up for this amazing tour around the city. And, you know what, yours truly will be volunteering, so maybe you'll see me filling wine cups at the pit stops. Yes, you heard correctly, the rest stops will be fuelled with vino (Gato Negro is a Sponsor) as well as water and Gatorade.

Sign up to ride it, sponsor a rider or volunteer

Hope to see you there!!

BREAKING NEWS: I'M GOING TO NEW YORK!

To compete to be the newest face of KMS California

My spoils currently include an all expenses paid trip to New York City, and a year's supply of KMS products. I'm a lucky lucky girl!

I have to create some looks with the KMS products and hopefully show everyone why I AM KMS CALIFORNIA!

It looks like there will be a voting module for people to pick their favorite finalist. So I will be sure to let you all know when you can log in and vote for me.

Thanks for Mark for the gorgeous photos that KMS loved and helped to get me to the finals.

What a thrill!

Water Wars!! Good Bye Pop Fizz Hello Tap Flat!

Again, I'm reading the Toronto Star (I love that paper!) and the front page carries one of the most upsetting headlines to date. 8 were murdered and left in a farmer's field outside of London, ON.

You know what? Karmacake isn't always about the downers, it's about the uppers! Oh, uppers AND poignant personal point of views, delivered in a refreshingly effervescent personal style that is uniquely good Karma!

So here's what's going on in my head: While, insanely huge multi-billion dollar companies, like MacDonald's, actively target multiple age groups (from Ronald McDonald for the kiddies to Deli Sandwiches for the Adults). Multi-billion dollar soft drink companies are targetting what the Baby Boomers (ne 1946-1964) are doing.

So what are they doing? Baby Boomers are buying less pop and buying more water, fruit juice and ready-to-drink teas. As a result, companies like Coke and Pepsi are sad, the pop wars are all over. Boo Hoo!

BUT, DON'T CRY! The water wars are just beginning! New health conscious Baby Boomers are downing more bottled water than ever and companies are lapping up the profits! (har har!) Companies can make 40-50 cents profit from a bottle of water over 10 cents from a bottle of pop. Seems like a sweet deal. A sweet and profitable deal!

Coke and Pepsi have had a hand in the bottled water business since 1999 however they have yet to really push a strong branding exercise on the public. So the public (ie - Baby Boomers) really don't care what sort of water brand they drink. Now, the Baby Boomers might not care, but, I do! So I decided to talk to a few other MTV Generation folks and one Generation Y child to find out if anyone else cares.

We will begin with me!

I have a preference for Dasani. I just don't like the way Aquafina tastes. I tried their (Aquafina) flavoured water and it's like Pepsi tried to figure out a way to make their offensive water even more objectionable. However, if Evian, Fuji or anything in a fun bottle I'll purchase over either Dasani or Aquafina. Or, even better, I'll drink my own filtered tap water!

"Frig, doesn't matter... I'm not choosy with bottled water... I don't drink alot of water. I've been duped into always fruit juice or diet soda. It's all about the product, not the brand."

Mark B.
Photographer
Toronto, ON

"I buy whatever is cheaper... but, if I had to choose I would probably go for Aquafina because Dasani goes 'psssssssst' when you open it, which is mildly disturbing"

Kari
Publications Coordinator
Ottawa, ON

"I prefer Aquafina because my mother tells me it's better for me than Dasani."

Lena
Student (Token Generation Y)
Toronto, ON

"I don't usually go for name brands. They are priced way too high. I don't think there's Dasani or Aquafina in England... Our main brands are Evian and Perier... Mum buys water in bulk from Tesco and it tastes... ok, I guess."

Maryam
Student
London, England

So in the absolute end, there's no definitive answer. In the end, I'm still as crazy as I was before and the rest of the world really doesn't care about what brand of water they drink. However, price point is an issue.

Goes to show, the world's children will always listen to what mum has to say and cheap is always cheerful!

booyackacha!

PS - If you want to keep in the know in the world H2O scene try this website Fine Waters

Going Away Party!

A friend of mine is off on a one month adventure to Europe.
I'm going to bid him a fond adieu.
Tomorrow is Sunday. I'm roasting a chicken.

I wonder what side dishes will come tomorrow.

I wonder.

I hope something exciting happens tonight because right now I'm not feeling this relaxed blogging vibe I'm working.

I entered the Homegrown Hotties contest. Let's see if Maxim thinks I'm hot. If not, screw them!!

I have nothing left to say.

Shameless Tragitional Blogging

Too many people think I have a flare for writing an interesting blog and suggest that I should consider a career, doing what else, writing! These people, obviously blind to my chronically bad grammar and spelling syntax, should note: Bad Grammar and Bad Spelling isn't indicative of a successful writer.

Or is it?

I thought if there was one magazine I would ever write for it would be like my favorite magazine growing up, Sassy. Now a more grown up version Jane is available on newstands and caters to my age group. Sassy grew up.

Now on newstands there is a new kid on the block Shameless a brash quarterly magazine geared towards teenage women. I've only visited the website and I plan on picking up a copy this evening. But, what would I write if I did write for them? I would continue to be me and to write about whatever the heck strikes me.

Like my inspiration Sassy, I believe that the youth need to have a frank and honest reflection of their world. Either exposing them to something new and inspiring or being truthful about the things teens really are interested in. Girls love fashion, make up, boys, having fun, being a star in their own world, being taken seriously and learning about what is cool. I want to be the one to tell them that it's cool to make their own definition of cool.

Sassy never said make up was bad or that fashion was bad. In fact, in one issue you could learn to make Evan Dando's chocolate sauce, correctly apply foundation, how to make a wicked dress out of an ex's t shirt and finally what a girl can do to save her sisters in political strife in a foreign country.

You know what, Jane Pratt (former editor of Sassy and current editor of Jane) I am a Sassy Girl! I always will be, and I want to take your message to the world!

Hey Shameless are you ready to sass it up?

The 50's: Did People Really Do That!?

The average salary was $2000 and the average cost of bread was 14 cents. Men outnumbered women in the work force 3:1 and bomb shelter plans were widely available to the masses. In this wacky post war world man is king and he rules over his 2.5 children in a sterile Levitt Town Suburbia. Armed with tongs he chars meals over the bbq because for the first time in a long time, back yards are now extensions of people's living rooms and kitchens.

However, what atrocities happened in the 1950's goes beyond simply inequality of the sexes, races and the introduction of the television. There was the food. Convenience foods were rating high on every housewife's list from awful tv dinners to horrendous creations featuring jell-o, pop, angostura bitters and a whole lot of pimento stuffed olives!

There's no reason for these foods, but, they do provide a lot of humour for us now a days. Host a 1950's potluck, visit the Gallery of Regrettable Food for a laugh, or finally understand why so many people died in the 50's.

Quote: Defamer on Hefner

"We're not all surprised that Hefner was the bigger man and took steps to put this ugly situation behind him, allowing him to return to his crucial day-to-day responsibilities of enslaving half a dozen blondes at his Viagra-fueled sexual detention center."

-Defamer on Hugh Hefner's apology to Jessica Alba for her recent appearance on the cover of Playboy magazine.

Viagra-fueled detention centre... ahaha great line!

Pure Sadness: Clay Aiken's ex

DID YOU HEAR?! CLAY AIKEN IS GAY!
WHAT?!
IT'S TRUE!
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!?
ME TOO!
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WERE THE LAST ONE TO HEAR THAT HE'S A RAGING HOMO!
Oh..

I'm joking, I really did know about Gayken's sexual orientation. I seriously didn't think it was blog worthy. However, the pure sadness that is his ex strange bedfellow is oddly bloggerific. This dude, a really ugly pornstar and former real estate agent, not has his own blog. The blog, hosted by Blogspot, is a hideous rant that will never die about, what else, his trist with the American Idol loser.

I say loser in the most holistic sense.

The blog even has photos of Clay, the cloth Clay used, some ziploc bag (which I don't even want to know what it's used for) and Clay's love notes to John.

JP's blog is both dirty AND sad! That's why I chose to not post the link.

Gossip: Mother Naomi

She not only crushes personal assistants she also crushes Child Poverty!
Work it Naomi!
Work that 35 year old Supermodel tush for your "Honourary Grandfather" Mr. Nelson Mandela and for the benefit of underprivileged youth.

We remember the reports the last time you went to South Africa on an anti poverty, child saving, philanthropic charity whatever mission. You went with your buddy Kate Moss and aparently did lots and lots of drugs.

Chances are this time it's probably a similar scenerio, except you have uber PR rep Rob Shuter in your corner. BTW, readers, I am now accepting bets on whether Naomi will return to the US with:

A) An orphaned child
B) ... Ah geez, I'm out of ideas so let's just leave it at a baby and go from there.

Newsflash: Explosion Next Door.

I live in a little part of Toronto known as Yorkville. Yorkville is essentially an area filled with high end boutiques, elderly madames, little dogs, serious faces and tragic fashionistas. There is some great shopping and some great food to be had in my neighbourhood.

However, this past Sunday, Myself and the other Yorkville residents were shaken. The street outside my home was a crime scene. Blocked off from the Reference Library all the way to Yonge & Bloor. The reason was sketchy at the time, but, it turns out an individual had walked into the Tim Horton's washroom with a can of gasoline and proceeded to cause a flash fire. The fire turned into an explosion when the heat reached an air freshening unit causing a large bang that made the ceiling cave in. The individual was trapped and later died of smoke inhalation. Thankfully no one else was injured.

It's not clear if the individual was planning on killing themself or to just burn down the Tim Horton's.

The experience was frightening. Even if it wasn't a terrorist attack or a bomb exploding or a shooting, it was still disturbing. The security that you take for granted every day comes about and before you know it, you're standing in the wake of a tragedy that you and no one else could've prevented.

We are just cards in a deck. Someone's shuffled us about and is making a card house out of us. Even if I don't know every person I pass on the street, I rely on them. I rely on them to not do something that will damage my sense of security. I understand that sometimes someone will fall, but I also know that I can't stop trusting the world because living in fear is not living at all.

Remix: Sweet Young Things

"You should see her as Avril Lavigne!" Says Roger, a middle aged manager of pop tribute acts in the GTA. Or from what I saw, a purvayer of night club acts featuring enthusiastic young women.

The company, name still unknown, was auditioning young women this Saturday for a Pussycat Dolls Cover Band. Based upon first impressions, auditionees live partly in a 905 fantasy world. Clad in noxious shades of pink and pastels these ladies were dressed to induce vomiting rather than to kill. And, the accessories of choice included, you guessed it, pony tails and fits of hollow giggles. This was a girls club, and it was obvious my friend and I were intruding.

Baffled by conversation topics, even too mundane for me, included one girl who sang "Care Bear Stare!" while flaunting baby fat. I took shelter from what I thought to be a pending pillow fight. Thankfully Yazamataz and myself were spared.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't know it was going to be like this!" Yazamataz apologized.
"It's okay," I said, "I came to have a fun memory with you. I don't care about this audition. We're going to have fun!"

The auditions begin. So we're gathered into the living room of a rental house where a black curtain is hung infront of the window. We're encouraged to stand up and sing, "Dontcha", the PCD most famous single. One girl, who I called "Guccy Lucy", opted to booty shake, grind and giggle her way through it.

Where is the professionalism? Obviously not present at this audition!

We are asked to sing seperately. My friend sings with a nervous passion akin to a women aware that this isn't what she wants, but, she's in too deep to quit now!

Gucci Lucy's turn. The music starts and in a baffling display of confidence she articulates her inexperience with bumps, grinds and curious bootyshakes. In a fit of laughter she stops singing in the first verse "I can't do this!" she whines. Roger encourages her to sing. "But, it soOOoo repetative! I don't like singing it." and she goes over to Roger like a Jane to her John and shakes her modest female form.

I can't say he didn't enjoy it.

After my turn, it was clear. Professionalism, skill and talent are not necessary requirements to be in this group.

However, the girls weren't all baubles and bubble gum! I made conversation with one girl, a funky quietly strong women and a mother of an 18 month old. She's auditioning for the first time for the part of Carmit. And in a quiet admission between the two of us, PCD is not a band she would just pick up and listen to. She, unlike the other women, is there to make a little extra cash to help with her household expenses. I dig her. I dig her a lot. She's very cool.

Meanwhile, in the corner of my eye I'm treated with more gyration. I grow weary and step foreward to offer direction. I try to explain what it means to give focus to the lead performer, to move slowly and luxuriously because, "You're dancing burlesque"
"But, they do hip hop too" says a buxom young blond. I sigh in defeat because these girls just don't get it.

I make a space on the couch and wait for Yazamataz to return.

"It wasn't like this the last time I worked with them. It wasn't like this at all!"
"There's no need to apologise! How were you supposed to know that we were entering some promo man's wet dream interpretation of a pop burlesque troup?"
"I didn't"
"You're too smart and beautiful to be associated with this crap."
"I know."
"You're a professional. Amateurs sometimes don't see true greatness because they're bogged down on the trivial details."