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Sunday, December 24, 2006

Merry Christmas to all my beloved readers and then some.

Sorry I've been bad with the updates, but, there will be some good posts coming soon enough.

Regardless, it's the holidays so you shouldn't be online, go out and enjoy the day!

Love!
kc

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Now try DRAINSPOTTING!

I'm very serious... click here

Friday, December 15, 2006

It's been a crazy couple of days!
Last night I rocked on over to the Rivoli where Erol and I caught my friend Gilson's stand up.

Don't worry, that guy I used to date didn't put me off of comedy for long, I'm actually kind of getting into it! The night had a fabulous line up of diverse comedians, and although some rocked the Riv harder than others, I was totally entertained!

Now, of course, at the cost of my soul. Which, if you're a faithful Karmacake reader, you understand is at scarce supply these days. Click here to see when the decaying began.

It started innocently with Jean Paul's fantasy world of cocks for sale like carrots in a grocery, progressed to giving a girl a cold to find out how long it takes her to recover from it as a easy AIDS test, peaked at fucking cerebal palsy girls committed to wheel chairs, plateaud at throat fucking and then a moderate increase at fucking a cross eyed chick... or what is the Tampons as Thank You presents.

In the end, the humour ran high, the alcohol ran freely, and although, Miss Diane from MTV Canada was hosting it with slurred speeche and a beer in hand, she maintained her assertiveness over a crowd of dirty mean.

Oh wow, insanely tired, I'll have to finish this tomorrow.
Sorry!

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

I know what you're thinking and no, it's not a song by Peaches.

As I was cruising the net, in that way I often do, I came across a unique website called "Bush in 30 Seconds". Although established in 2004 as a campaign to raise awareness to President Bush's inefficacy as leader of the US, Bush in 30 Seconds transferred the voice of political advertisements to the creativity of everyday Americans.

The concept: Have a competition that encourages the public to create an ad that challenges Bush as the ideal leader of the US. You can make an animation, gear it towards children or adults, you have complete creative freedom. It doesn't matter what you do in the political ad, except for, you have got to make it compelling.

Every year a few dozen Washington consultants churn out political ads with similar messages in similar formats. Subsequently, people tune out. Truthfully, that kind of defeats the purpose of a political ad. So a group of musicians, photographers and executives come together and decide to fight the apathy and make people notice political ads.

Not to mention, make people notice the devastation that Bush has inflicted upon the American people. Is this a shocker to you? Regardless of whether this website is 2 years out of date, the messages are absolutely true to this day. George Bush has compramised the integrity of the US, in terms of National Security, has damaged the US economy and has single handedly ransacked the environment and to what profitable end?
I don't think any.
Yet, the wicked boy who's throwing sand in the faces of his playmates, needs to take a time out. Just like the people who voted for Bush. All of you TIME OUT!

And, watch these videos.

Highly witty, they apply as much today as a warning to voters looking to elect a similar president into power.

Go check out the website here watch the films and enjoy everything they have to offer.

Apathy amongst voters is a common thing these days... However, if we didn't posses any power with the vote we yield then projects that seek to expand your mind to the devastation of Bush, such as Bush in 30 seconds.

Brilliant website.
Brilliant concept.
The Truth will breed strength in the numbers of people who want change.

There were a few things that were mentioned on the Liquid Lunch today, so I thought if you got to my blog, you deserved to find those links:

1. Patricia Fields - Sex and the City and Ugly Betty Costumer has her own fabulous online boutique of fabulous shopping for the thriving fashionista in us all.

2. Foxy Originals - The original jewellery line that's been sported on Nelly Furtado and Paris Hilton is a Toronto brand! Not only that you can purchase it across Canada and the USA, but, you can read about it in magazines from UK's OK, to Flare, CosmoGirl and LouLou.

3. Mickey Avalon - junkie post-pop cure for the rock and roll blues. His debut self-title album was released November 7th and has not left my cd player yet.

Monday, December 11, 2006

You know you shouldn't be dating the guy you've been seeing for 2 years when he makes you listen to his favorite song called "The Lap Dance is Better When the Stripper is Crying"

Word to the wise ladies.

Standing right behind Alan Thick, TV's favorite dad, is a bloated looking Karmacake.

You can imagine what a thrill it was to be in his presence. I was beside myself! I was aglow, agog with admiration and gushing with loveliness... Because now I can tell the world I am 2 degrees of seperation from Leonardo DiCaprio. I still have his assistant's email address.

Never before that day of discovery that I could potentially be fixed up on a date with Leonardo DiCaprio, have I been as excited as I am now to be on Natradio's Liquid Lunch tomorrow at 1pm.

Yes, all of my KC readers across the globe and tune in and hear me, Karmacake, take on popculture with words you can hear, instead of words you can read. It's a rare treat, and I hope you all tune in! If you don't, I will cry, and if I cry, I will hold you personally responsible and with rage in my heart, I will find you.

So don't forget to Click here to listen in tomorrow December 12, 2006 at 1pm!

Tune in.
Enjoy.
Laugh.
Give me feedback.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

I found this on my blog search, and I needed to share it with everyone...

http://www.overstock.com/?page=proframe&prod_id=1930936

Are you as creeped out as I am.

I've seen a few films lately that have reaffirmed my faith in Hollywood films. For a while, who wanted to go? Thin plotlines in aggressively long diatribes not only are boring, but, the definitly put a shelf life on the time one can sit in those seats.

Yep, the quality of a film can be measured in how fast it takes for your arse to get sore in the seats.

Am I right, or am I right?
Damn straight I'm right, Child!

So please stick with me for 3 films that will entertain you and keep your bums from going numb.

1. Casino Royal - For an obsessed Bond fan, Casino Royal is pure decadence. Daniel Craig's charisma matched with his undesputed talent charges the screen with sophistication and rugged sensuality. The women in the theatre were swooning, while I was stiffling squeaks of joy.
Daniel Craig plays James Bond with a sensitivity not seen since Sean Connery. He nailed it. Go see this movie!

2. Borat - Cohen's devastating humour will violate you mentally, physically and spiritually. He will grab ahold of all you thought was bizarre about the USA and wring the truth out. What will drip down is a film that can only be watched to truly understand the impact it will have on your life. You will feel dirty and wrong, however, you will want Cohen to make you feel that way over and over again.
My only question is, how will Cohen ever top this? Matching is mediocre and falling short will be inexcuseable.

3. Blood Diamond - A film that will leave you feeling changed. You will be on the edge of your seat for the duration of the film. You will laugh, you will cry, you will leave understanding greed in the face of senseless killing all in the name of our hunger for diamonds.
I walked into the film, feeling cocky, "How can this movie make me love diamonds any less?" Well I still love them, I just don't want to wear them, unless I can be sure that the product is conflict free. Which means, after watching this film, I'm buying vintage, antique or I'm hoofin' it to the diamond mine myself to extract my own stone.
Performances in this film were bar none the best across the board.

Please, go see Blood Diamond, you will leave feeling that watching that film truly was the best use of your time.

There's only one place where you're going to find one of the purest voices of our generation. It's in the UK, it's on television, the show is called X-Factor and the wunderkind is 21 year old receptionist no more, Leona Lewis.

Lewis hails from London, UK and posesses a voice that can not be described better than with the tears I was compelled to shed when I heard her rendition of "Over the Rainbow."

Simon Cowell called this performance "The single best performance I ever witnessed"
I consider Lewis to be the one performer who has redeemed "Idol" inspired television shows. I'm glued to the YouTube just so I can see more of her performances.

I suppose there's no going back to her life as a receptionist!

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Find me a person who doesn't dream of sporting a bad-ass tattoo? Heck, obviously it is THE thing to do because even children are asking for them. So for your karmic pleasure, I present to you the Phat Tat Guide for People Who Can't Commit.

I'm not talking Henna tattoo, stick on tattoos or heck even realistic temporary tattoos (yes, mum I know you ditched my collection when I was in high school)

I'm talking about these 2 options.

1. The Gr8 Tat2 at home tattoo kit for kids. Spinmaster Toys has created a number of tattoo kits for children, including the airbrush tattoo kit. Finally, Spin Master Toys have figured out a way for kids to open up their own tattoo parlor!

SCREW THE LEMONADE STAND!
I-Tattoo or the Gr8 TaT2 kit, has a soft, safe pulsating action tattoo pen that creates realistic and washable designs with dramatic effects. If you're not convinced, why not read an actual comment from a proud parent:

**** Butch, Tattoo artist from Texas, from Home of the Dallas Cowboys

My kid tattoos better than I do!


My kid is now more skilled at tattooing than I am. We sure do have fun.
One word - darling.

Finally, a Christmas present that trains our children for a profitable career in, or out, of jail.

2. Freedom-2: The First Safe Tattoo Ink.
Yeah, this isn't an at home tattoo kit, but, it's pretty cool still. Harvard Scientists have figured out a way that they can tattoo safely with an ink that is easily removed. The ink, which is applied in the standard and somewhat repellent process, can be easily broken down by laser light and absorbed into the body.

That's it. There's no comic value, what are you expecting? KC to open her mouth and cut the product down to size? Nope, I'm jazzed about this product and cannot wait until it's available in Canada so that I may finally get a tattoo.

Why? Because, I'm a wuss, and, I like to have the option to reverse the decision.
I cry too.
Commercials, movies, and tv shows.

Friday, December 08, 2006

Save your money on the following:

1. Pusateri's home made lemonde. The concoction is brewed from the recipe on the side of the Realmon Lemon Juice container. I know this, because, I hate Realmon with a passion. The taste and gag reflex were identical.

2. Pusateri's Healthy Snack. Heinous. soggy oats layered in curdling soy product and Billy Bee honey. The 3 berries on top are hardly enough to warrant the $5 price tag on this retch inducing parfait.

High end groceries should not be excused for poor product.

December is turning into a fabulous month of people, parties and periodic moments of insanity!

After a fitting for Roma Rush's upcoming boutique opening and fashion show, I hit Urban Supper Club's party at The Cosmopolitan Hotel. The Fabulati were out for mingling and delicious snacks in The Designers Suite. The martinis flowed like blasphemous sacrament on unbapatized heathens and I kicked them back with delicous piety.

The party escalated with Canadian Opera darling Measha Bruggergosman infecting the crowd with her fiercly charming style and laugh. Bustle Clothing co-creator Shawn Hewson was present and was more than happy to share laughs over Fashion Week anecdotes. Yep, the crowd was a good one, regardless of the two heinous women who proceeded to make out in the sauna. The food was good, the company great and the suite, gorgeous. I rate the USC party a B+

Thursday night, Foxy Originals Friends and Family sale. Sale. SALE! The lower level of Empire Restaurant and Grill on Cumberland was transformed into a fabulous accessories sale. So I purchased a bevvy of items ideal for the gift drawer in the closet and for me!

Left the Foxy party and rocked on over to Amber to eat a 20 dollar lamb burger, but, the feature was no necessarily the food but, the mysterious appearance of a 6'8" Tranny. So like the transexual white rabbit I followed what this woman had to show and she took me into a den of highly meterosexual men and overly processed Tarterati. In the centre... Ben Mulroney.

To dispell the myths, Ben Mulroney is as he is on tv. Vacant expression, tanned, and I couldn't tell if his skin was injection molded plastic or simply just caked in 4 inches of make up. And, like two simlarly charged magnets, I was repelled from the crowd.

My fabulousness would have surely been lost, and Amber, lost it's sparkle.

It's Ben Mulroney's haunt.
Not, KC's.

We must never exist in the same space.
Ever.
ick.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006


Yep, geek dancing is fun. It happens mostly with Jax I realized.

Enjoy, Geek Dancing Photos!!









Tuesday, December 05, 2006

If waking up to the shrill voices of The View castmates wasn't terrible enough, you can now sip your morning brew with the four wackos of morning tv silently judging you from a calming blue background.

For $15 US, you can own this hideous piece of porcelain to remind you of the women you never want to become.

Rosie: The homosexual Rev. Jesse Jackson
Barbwah: The only woman who can break you with a lisp.
Joy: The opiniated, misinformed Jew
Elizabitchl: The Crazy Right Wing one.

If you're not sure if Rosie is accusing you of being a homophobe, or if Elizabitch is going to start crying because you think the war in Iraq is futile RELAX and sip sip sip your way to sterility! The floating disembodied heads will surely qwell your desire to ever have sex again. And that is completely unrelated the potential lead poisoning you may incur from using the mug.

It's true the following was posted on the mug website:

California residents please be advised, as per the Prop. 65 Warning: Use of leaded tableware, for sale on this Website, will expose you to lead, a metal known to the State of California to cause birth defects and other reproductive harm. FDA compliance: California law requires all ceramic tableware products to comply with U.S. Food & Drug Administration standards for lead release.


Why? Because, the women on The View, they hate you and your life too.

Don't worry about that feeling you get when you look at the mug. Now you can retch and have a place to catch it too!

Monday, December 04, 2006

I thought this was fitting to post right after the Charlotte's Web post... An hour ago, it was reported that George Clooney's pot belly pig kicked it.

Yes, that's right.

The death of George Clooney's pot belly pig, Max, is an important matter and I'm glad that Clooney's publicist, Stan Rosenfield released a statement. Why only last week I was thinking, "I wonder how George Clooney's pot belly pig is doing. I wonder if he's been able to control his weight problems. I wonder if he's even met a new girlfriend."

The cause of death is undetermined.
Probably heart troubles caused by excessive midsection girth.

George Clooney no doubt is sad.
I can be loyal, eat excessively and squeal with delight!!
I also would LOVE a 18 year relationship with George Clooney.

George, why not upgrade. Gimme a call. I won't look at you tearfully when you eat bacon.
I'll join you.


Like smoking during the funeral of a man that died with lung cancer, as is wearing fur to a screening of Charlotte's Web.

The original love animals "they are thinking beings too good to be chopped up for dinner" movie had a message that my 6 year old brain understood back in the day. However, the message was missed entirely by Miss Kimora Lee Simmons, who showed with her children sporting fur fur and more fur.

Chictard award goes to a fashionista.
You lost it baby.

I tried to find another photo but I couldn't. So I stole this one from Perezhilton.com...

Apparently, the woman was there with her children... where are they? Standing out of frame so mommy can cling to fame, no doubt.

Next week Kimora Lee Chach Shot?

Sometimes, when inspiration hits, I'm knocked off track. I had intended to post a light a lovely blog then I came across an article about anorexics and bulimics using the internet for support.

Support to continue their eating disorders!

If you've been following the blog for a while, you know I'm a huge supporter of realistic proportions for fashion models, acceptance of varied body shapes in the media, as well as, educating young women to never feel inadequate about their bodies. So you can imagine how it was important to me to write about this.

Anorexia and Bulimia are intensely complex disorders that has psychological, neurobiological and sociological components. But, regardless of the disorders complexities, it is a demon that is hard to fight. The pressure to be thin is apart of the noble quest for beauty. However, while the majority of women accept their shape, many others are willing to sacrifice their health to obtain it.

Now with the internet, the rise of the Pro-Ana subculture seeks to normalize the disorder positioning it as a lifestyle choice rather than a mental disease. Pro-Ana discussion boards provide support for those in denial as well as provide tips on how to maintain the lifestyle. This includes, suggestions on how to maintain a mask of a normal eating habit to please concerned loved ones.

"I feel sooo empowered right now! I managed to dodge my lunch problems and have only had 35 calories today!! I love it!! Keep thinking thin ladies!!"
- 0wishicouldbe0
Think that's upsetting? Try reading Augusta's blog she goes states that just wants to wake up and be thin and beautiful. For me, she is like the poster child for a trend that is becoming all too common. This year at Toronto Fashion Week, models were particularly gaunt, the only food available was lettuce, people left feeling poor about their shape instead of inspired by the clothes.

Celebrities are diminishing before our eyes, and while gossip rags denounce the freakishness of their slight figures, they heckle them when they put on weight.

Two models have died already this year. And, while Spain has already put a ban on skinny models, we have yet to apply the same laws in Canada. Where will the madness end, the world can accept that eating disorders are real, they are a disease and they are promoted by the media.

Girls of the world, I'm laying it out for you, right here! The effects of poor eating effect more than just body size. Not eating induces the following:

- growth of hair all over your body
- slower heart rate and reduced metabolism
- Deficiency in vitamins and minerals leaving you open to get sick sick sick!
- Reduced immune system function
- Pallid skin and sunken eyes

and the list goes on. Eating disorders are not an effective lifestyle choice.
Your car doesn't run without gas.
And, you die when you don't eat.

Feed the models, Heal the children.

Sunday, December 03, 2006


We shot the scene!
Done! Done! Done!

In the dining room of my condo, five fabulous women (Irma, Karmacake, Erin, Laura, & make up artist Sarah), and our directort joined forces at 8am in the morning and filmed a scene for "The Unspoken Words".

It took a lot to get to that point, including cast members dropping out last minute, illness, death, location changes, date changes, runs in stockings and constant fits of giggles between sips of Turkish coffe.... It was a long hard road, but we made it. And, in record time our scene was shot.

The shoot was a discovery experience for all of us and has easily translated into some other side projects. Including a fun series shot for YouTube, featuring us girls tackling hard topics of pop culture with fierce sobriety and irreverent humour.

Stay tuned, my sugar plums!

The film is to be released in January.
And, Karmacake can be found passed out on a couch in her living room.
I'm exhausted!

Saturday, December 02, 2006

The Karma curse:

When I open my mouth and I say something that, by all means, would be true or highly probable it takes a desperate turn south.

My recent post in regards to the Liberal convention had me call him out as a non-contender. After the results, Dion is the Liberal Party's new leader.

Dion, you can thank me later.

Now what else can I bless?

Friday, December 01, 2006

Here we go, Kids! Put on your seatbelts, Paul Martin's successor is about to get voted in and you better be ready for the results. Because, the man they vote in will probably be "The man who would rule Canada."

Who is up for grabs?

1. Bob Rae - Recent Polls favor him. I know you're wondering why, does it have to do with his age? Vote him in, and inevitably he would kick it before we would even reach a Federal election. Or does it have to do with tonight's speech, which "will express a passion for Canada, knowledge of Canada, experience solving problems in Canada and running a government in Canada."

hardy har har.

Liberals might be blinded since his sister dated Trudeau in the 60's Hell if that ain't a seal of approval from the patron saint of Liberals, then I don't know.

But blessings will be revoked when the candidate abandons the party for the NDP and then fucks up Ontario during the 1990's. What are Liberals thinking?!

If Rae is voted in, the Liberals obviously aren't thinking. Yeah, Rae has experience, experience in screwing up. Please, I refuse to blame the recession! I see that as the challenge by which a leader would have conquered in their bid to earn the title of good leader.

A title Rae obviously did not earn AND in turn, tainted the reputation of the NDP's in the process.

2. Ignatieff - Oh Michael Michael. With your wacky wife, and your big mouth, you would be an entertaining leader. You had the most popular suite at the Liberal rally at the beginning of the year. He's probably the lesser of the evils, organized and steadfast are two qualities he presents. But, he's got no sparkle and shine.

3. Kennedy - Definitly the hottest of all the candidates. And, don't you know that good looks are an important factor when choosing a candidate? He believes in maintaining the unity of Canada and nay's the Harper notion that Quebec should be recognized as a nation within Canada. Justin Trudeau supports him... and we all love Trudeau! Sasha, if you're reading this, call me.

4. Some dude named Dion - Look, I don't know who he is but I think he got 16 percent support. I wish I could say more beyond he's an academic.

There you have it.
They vote tonight for a man they hope You will vote for tomorrow.
We'll see.

Thursday, November 30, 2006


How do you know Aunt Flo is visiting Britney?

Her Chach is covered.

Lord knows it ain't because of modesty!




Thanks Perez Hilton, I snagged this photo from your website!


It's not a holiday that's terribly festive, but, that's not the point of World AIDS Day.

For one day out of a year, the public is encouraged to reflect, review and realize where we have come in terms of AIDS diagnosis and treatment as well as how far we have still to go.

This year's theme is STOP AIDS. KEEP THE PROMISE and we all can make a difference. It takes a little courage, a little heart and maybe a little interest to check out one of the events.

Ignorance and predjudice increases the spread of a preventable disease everyday in regions that are not just defined by their poverty. Globally, 65 million people are living with AIDS yet only 1.5 million have access to treatment.

But, don't think it ends there, I've got more statistics for you and they ain't so pretty... 25 million have died since 1981 and 2.6 million died in 2006 alone.

The stats are supposed to be scary, because the world is ravaged by a pandemic that coninually effects more than effective international response can assist.

Stand up, make a commitment to yourself and the world to help conquer AIDS. Educate yourself, get tested, make a donation and...

speak out.


Who doesn't love the holidays?
I love them a little bit more because NOW I have Hot Santa!
Fido Wireless has reinvented the traditional Jolly ol' Saint Nick into a super sexy, argyle sweater vest wearing, altruistic and libidinous bad ass.

He's hot.
He's got style.
He's got an El Camino instead of a Sleigh.

*sigh*

He appears in Fido's ads for the Unlimited Christmas Package. And, if you haven't seen the adverts, you can click here and watch it for yourself.

Hot Santa can slide down my chimney and father my children.

What?! He's hot! Don't judge me. You want him too.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Look, I realize there are much more important topics to cover in this world, but, I'm afraid I have to deal with a topic that is by far more disturbing than anything you'll see on the front page of the The Star.

What could this be? Celebrity coochies are on the loose! And, boy are they ever loose!

har har

So let's have a brief timeline of the paparazzi cunt hunt...

It began with shots of Paris' naughty bits, plateaued with Lindsay Lohan's famously nicknamed firecrotch and progressed to Britney Spear's nearly successful rebound cooch.

WHAT IS GOING ON!?

The debutants at the charm school cotillion are probably busting their bolts like a Stepford Wife short circuit.

So pink is the new "wardrobe malfunction", I see. Breasts are so yesterday's news and please, sex tapes! They scatter attention amongst the participants. It's obvious that to grab attention, celebrities needed to come up with a new strategy, and what a strategy it is!!

Paris, well your crotch is a road well travelled, so I have little to say.
Lindsay, you cannot over compensate for your declining career with your hoochie. It's even less entertaining than your recent film career.
Britney, I have nothing to say. Just ew. Put a towel down or something.

Monday, November 27, 2006

Jared Leto, violent blog hater, is now dating the quintessential queen of the Blogiverser, Tila Tequila.

I guess Tila likes it rough, bop bop.

Jared Leto, pretty but untalented actor/singer, just needs to shut his mouth and do what he does best, and look pretty. According to him, "Blogging today is like yesterday's parachute pants".

Yeah, and actor's persuing singing careers is like yesterday's emorific smudged black liner. But, that's not stopping him from doing either.

Oh Tila, convert that man, and teach him how to blog.

I am not ashamed to say it. I love Hilary Duff's perfume, With Love.

I wrote a blog back in the day that panned Celebrity fragrence lines. Oh how I'm eating crow right now, but, I don't care.

Hilary Duff's new fragrence is my new favorite thing. It hardly smells like the porceline vaneers, non invasive plastic surgery and bulemia that we might come to expect.

In fact, it's an oriental scent with champagne, fruit and musky wood aromas that I'm addicted to. I don't want to stop smelling my wrist, I don't care if the world thinks I'm a secret service agent, this fragrence is da'bomb.

But, does the bottle have to look like Elizabeth Tayler's White Diamonds? Kind of morbid foreshadowing, don't you think?

Sunday, November 26, 2006

I've had a little project that fell my way, it's a little indie flick focused around the topic of the cat fight and the sensationalism of the cat fight in the media.

Kind of sounds like a topic for SNL's "Coffee Talk" with Linda Richman. "I'm getting a little verklempt! Consider this: the term catfight has nothing to do with cats fighting. Discuss"

So let's discuss!

The cat fight as in two females pitted against each other for ratings, boost in sales or just plain, one on one maliciousness. From our all time favorite cat fight of Paris and Nicole to Condolezza Rice and Hilary Clinton. In the end, two females sincerely cannot be competing against each other without the media blowing the whole affair up into a... catfight!

meow.

If that's the case, why can't we have a male catfight? I would adore an announcement of a catfight between Gee Double-ya and Kerry? Oh hell, I'd be down to rename Bush's War on Terrorism and call it "The Bush/Terror Catfight" But, truthfully, who wants to see yee ol' Prez sit in a ring and contemplate how to fight himself? Poor man can't even have a fork in front of him without someone putting a cork on the prongs.

Regardless, there is a culture associated with the catfight and the film "Unspoken Words" deals with bringing this culture to light. I'm in the opening scene, where a supposed honest and frank discussion between a group of women goes awry. Click here to check out the podcast interview that was aired on Natradio's Liquid Lunch. Note: Liquid Lunch is daily streaming radio broadcast featuring on of my favorite hosts, the saucy Irma Gagnon. Tune in, you'll love it.

So in a somewhat related, but, not discussed in this post:
1. To all my friends this is why I haven't been around
2. Yes, this really is a project
3. If you're interested in learning more, or finding out how you can contribute click here

If you've been living under a rock, then you probably haven't heard about Michael Richards losing his cool on stage at the Laugh Factory last week.

The melt down began with heckles from the audience and went from zero to 666 in point 5 seconds. If you haven't seen the abhorrant tyrad click in and watch it right here:



To say this is shocking is a great understatement! Here we see the man that the public relied on as loveable Kramer on NBC's hit tv show Seinfeld reduced to a man addicted to "Rage-ahol" (Simpsons reference. Yes, you should feel bad if you don't get it.) If you want to read about some of her other rage induced episodes, click in to Margaret Cho's blog.

I don't believe that his on stage attacks were a product of embedded racism, rather, the result of a weak man with an anger problem resort to the lowest common denominator to obviously inflict pain.

It backfired.

Of course, racial jokes are par for the course in comedy. Horrific racial slander directed to an individual in an audience... eh, not so much.

When a control addict creep wants to put the world down he's obviously upset about something and it probably had nothing to do with that guy interrupting Mr. Richards' flow. It could've been anyone, it could've been me. But, thankfully it wasn't... I was in Toronto that night, because I live there.

So what's happening now? Mr. Richards has engaged in a PR tour to repair his damaged reputation. Probably the most press the fading comedian has received in a decade. Well, in my mind, it doesn't matter if he appeared on Rev. Jesse Jackson's radio show to his sincerest apologies and to defend his anti-racism.

Apparently, Richards told Jackson that he had not used the language before and that the devasting rethoric came through him "like a freight train". I find it hard to believe, but, I'm neither the judge nor the jury.

In the end, I'm disappointed, when you see hate magnified it rattles your faith in ever reaching a truly tolerant community. Like Margaret Cho said on her blog "Has the White Power Movement ever had a celebrity spokesperson?"

No, I don't believe so.
But, now they do.
Congrats Mr. Richards.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Thank you The Buzz for allowing me to write you a little piece on Christmas prep in the thriving metropolis of Toronto.

You gave me my Carrie Bradshaw moment.

Sitting infront of my window, looking down on Bay and Davenport, I typed thoughtfully on my laptop about what it meant to be celebrating the holidays in Upper Canada. Though I had no cigarette to butt out, I did have a licorice wip I worked on while writing.

Islanders, keep an eye out for the December issue to hit news stands.

It's small, but, it's a step in the right direction and it's a step that I got by myself.

Because, Karmacake would love a hand out, she just knows that she would rather work hard for every little job she earns.

:)

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

I should be sleeping right now but I can't just yet. I got stuck in a myriad of wistful memories of my hometown, Summerside, and how in Upper Canada it's hard to explain where it is that I'm from.

My ex sure never cared... So I suppose everyone would react the same way.
This post is mainly for my own benefit. You know, on those days I feel homesick I can just click in and remember.

This is Jubilee Theatre. It seats about 700 folks and it was the site of my first play on a real stage. I played Meg in Little Women for the Holiday show run.
My first fans were in the audience.
My first on stage kiss.
My first uncomfortably elaborate costume.
My first taste of stardom.
I subsequently sang at every Music Festival there and it was my goal to fill the entire theatre with my voice in opera.

The College of Piping, only a 5 minute walk from my house. I remember summers sitting in the bath serenaded by the obnoxious honk of bag pipes.
Sorry. I'm not a bag pipe fan.
I also learned how to sing Gaelic there and performed with many a iconic Island performers.
Great gift shop!! I got my Bodhran there!!

Daaaaamn, Spinnaker's Landing. I not only had lots of jobs there, I used to get my sailboat stuck in this dodgy little corner in the back. Ugh.
Fogarty's Cove and Papa Wheelies! Two of the best summer jobs a girl could've had. Loved Beth and Dave.


PEI Dirt Shirts. There was a time when falling in a red mud puddle was death for your pants. Well an Islander decided to do that with all white shirts and started one of tourists favorite clothing item: The PEI DIRT SHIRT

A shirt dipped in red mud.
Christmas presents everyone!



My Island in the winter.
Can you understand why I'm so sad I'm not going home this Christmas?
This is honestly what PEI looks like with snow... it's like nothing you will see anywhere else.

Here it is, down the street from my house was this... my high school!
TOSH aka Three Oaks Senior High.

I had a good time in High School, it's also when I started to turn into a hottie. Good times.

Ah, home sweet home.
Miss you PEI.
But, it's hard to be what I want to be there.
So I'm here.
For now.


Now you see it. Now you don't!
That's the concept behind Calgary's interest in erecting several disappearing Urinal stations around the city.

Canada's New West is on a mission to regulate human behaviour. No fighting, spitting or peeing in public! Bill Bruce, Calgary's director of bylaw services, assures Calgarians that they are "...not after people who get caught short and have to sneak into the bushes and take care of business"

The hilarity is, at least to me, that Calgary is taking on the responsibility of teaching their public etiquette! However, for some unknown reason, male Calgarians are reluctant to adopt proper behaviour unless it's paired with a fined. But, make no mistake, this is not uniquely a Calgary problem. This is an issue that is plaguing most Western Canadian cities!

In Saskatoon, the Public Spitting, Urination and Defecation Prohibition Bylaw has been in effect for two years. And, in the past year 50 residents have been charged under the bylaw.

If you are unsure on what qualifies as spitting, then no fret, the bylaw conveniently outlines that for you. It simply means "to eject phlegm, saliva, chewing tobacco juice or any other substance from the mouth."

How about poo? Historically, there's a lot of that what spewed out of Ralph Klein's mouth on more than one occasion.

Okay, I digress.

BC also is having a problem with public urination and have subsequently invested in testing out hydrolic urinals for Bastion Square. Hopefully this will qwell the chronic scourge of the inebriated male population who just can't hold it in. By day, the urinals sleep in a subterrinian home, by night the vampiric urinals rise to the convenience of many.

Downside, the European made Urilift comes with a $75,000 price tag. Now, honestly, is public urination really a serious problem if you're only earning about $5,000 in fines? The "problem" is barely paying for the unit itself.

Just have stands for empty water bottles. Portable and handy, it can work hand and hand with existing recycling programs.

Imagine, commissioning a resort built for the affluent and upwardly mobile population streaming out of Taipei. The concept revolves around futuristic pods arranged like an Orwellian community, only to be abandoned.

This was Taiwan's government's failed dream. However, mysterious circumstances surrounding deaths of several construction workers consequently left the site, not only, abandoned but clouded in rumours that it is also haunted.

Locals say the site is occupied by the ghosts of those workers who died in vain at the hand of numerous mysterious accidents. Apparently, because they aren't remembered they are unable to pass to the next world, and because this is considered a grave site, demolishing the units is apparently not an option.
The myth surrounding this little San Zhi resort somehow makes the
images much more special.


Apparently, the 4 pod construction made the units inexpensive to produce at some point in the 80's. Of course, nothing is confirmed on the buildings since the architects are unnamed and the construction workers who are still around are mum.

What is known is that somewhere, right now, there are a league of Orthodox Hipster Bohemians with their eye on the property to free the spirits from their earthly shackles and to transform the property into a commune of flower children and livestock.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006


If I shouted in a crowded room, "All my Canadians in the house, stand up if you love Rick Mercer!" The man would get a standing ovation.

Rick Mercer is the original smart mouthed, political satirist.

The original informed pundit.

But, my lord, the man does go on! I rocked on over to his blog, and yes, it's filled with interesting political commentary, but, lots of interesting political commentary.

As always, I'm on a quest to make information accessible to the general public, to hopefully reinvigorate people's interest in current events, arts, culture and just generally having a social conscience.

In short, encourage people to look past the end of their own nose.

Mr. Mercer is attempting the same thing, and he gets points for the blog. But, you know what... not everyone has the blog talent.

I did love this line from Rick Mercer's Blog, in reference to Conservative Candidate Diane Haskett:

"Like most Canadians I am watching the campaign leading up to the by-election in London Ontario with baited breath."

Oh, we're watching, Mr. Mercer. The London by-election truly is up there on my list of things to bait my breath over. Next to reminding Belinda Stronach to breath in and breath out. Of which, I conveniently try to forget lest she might finally go away.

My faith is: London won't forget the $10,000 fine Diane Haskett opened the door for when she violated gay tax payer's rights. The pricey statement was to the effect of "endorsing homosexuality" would require her to "turn her back on God".

Diane Haskett: Conservative Candidate and Modern Day Apostle for Coles Notes Bible Thumpers! The representative for people requiring a phonetic transcription "Geezuz" to appear throughout the paper back. Diane was there, she's had trouble finding the source of that little footnote next to Jesus' name and she's ready to stand on your behalf in Parliament and shout "Footnote Four is the SON OF GOD!

"The lord Jesus loves you all! Except for the gays."

Contradiction! WOOooo!

Love you, Mercer.
Shorten the Blog.

Monday, November 20, 2006

What I call the Holiday Hex is nothing more than annual Holiday shopping. Elbowing your way down an aisle in an over crowded shop to only emerge sweaty, irate and dishevelled.

Ugh, it's horrible. Thank God for online shopping!!

But, these windows at Holt Renfrew's flagship on Bloor West here in Toronto truly make for a beautiful distraction. I look forward to the window dressings every year, but, this year they are particularly exquisite. Enough to sooth the rage in my soul roused from an hour in the same mall as thousands of stunned migrating cattle with credit cards.

If you haven't checked the windows out, you really must. Mannequins luxuriously posed in thousand dollar gowns and celebrating the season in a frosted Gothic fantasy world.

The artistry is all so very very beautiful.

It's one of those days.
It's grey, cold and the trees are shaken loose of their leaves.
HIDE YOUR SHAME
*sigh*
Bring back summer.

I look at that photo and I dream about sleeping, but, it's not to be had just yet. Too much still to do when the end of the day comes and it has to do with cleaning and getting the venue booked for the next party.

Moments ago I went to the loo, the route stears me past Atom Egoyan's office, who I have yet to see hold office hours. I was shocked to discover that the door was open, the lights were on and obviously his Egoyan-ness was there.

I love how we're pretty much office buddies. The Cake and The Atom

Sunday, November 19, 2006

What is a blog?
Sarah is totally confused.... my baby faced friend has never encountered a blog.

I think she thought it was a giant blob like mass similar to Jabba the Hutt on Star Wars.

Darling.

So now, needless to say, she's a hooch for da cake

DA KARMACAKE!

peace

Friday, November 17, 2006


Last night we had a wee soiree at UC's Sexual Diversity Studies to celebrate the establishment of the Roberts Fund. A student award for Lesbian Gay Bi and Transgendered youth that's available to all U of T students.

One step closer to helping foster a more inclusive and accepting community.

We had a good time, people from the community and the university were there to usher it in with style.

Gourmet Galaxy catered and it was delicious.
Mark Bradfield came and snapped the photos.
Mark allowed me to snap some shots.

A merry time was had by all!
Or, should I say a "Gay" time was had by all.
gay meaning homosexual AND happy.
forget it.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006


For all you haters out there, please enjoy this link

You will see yours truly modelling the sauciest little dress that ever molded to my body. Thank you Mendocino Flagship on Bloor West, your people dressed me well!

Thanks Operanation for giving me a reason to dress with style on October 13, 2006.

Thanks Jak and Jil for recognizing that I'm a star. I will overlook the misspelling of my name because when you have style, your clothes speak for you!

I'm trying to write my teensy piece for Prince Edward Island's A&E paper The Buzz and I am stuck in a funk.

I can't get the words in my head to flow out of my fingers and onto my computer screen. Why? Well, it has a little something to do with Microsoft's inability to not suck.

As you know, I have a new computer: Lappy 3000. Lappy came with all the bells and whistles including Microsoft Office. I mean, how convenient is that? Word Processing on a home computer, what a novel concept? Well apparently, it is! Because as I attempt to install Microsoft Office, Microsoft refuses to allow me.

The product key that Microsoft gave me, is invalid. Customer Support had a fab idea, I should log online and buy a new key... FOR $249!!!

NOT LIKELY!

So now I have writer's block, no word processor, and I'm irate that Microsoft wants to violate me against my will. So what's a girl to do? I first hit the net trying to locate some illegal key or a crack so I can stick it to the man. However, the websites that have this information ask me politely to sign up for some free porn to get the key.

I mean porn and spam are my two favorite pork products, but, it goes bad pretty fast. Luckily, I found a msg board thread that advertised a lifesaving product called Open Office. This is yet another special product that is constructed by braniacs for people like me. Well meaning children who are tired of the over priced and over hyped software that we feel forced to buy. Well now we're not. Now we have paint.net instead of photoshop and Open Office instead of Microsoft Office.

Hallelujah!

So now I have writer's block, a useless word processor I need to uninstall, a little less anger towards Microsoft, and a whole lot of anxiousness for Open Office to install and I can stick it to the man.

This is without Microsoft getting all Metallica on my ass and suing me like Napster on a summer's day.

Viva la Mac!

Sunday, November 12, 2006

In the ongoing spirit of bringing the world in an accessible and entertaining way, I decided today to blog about birth control. It's high time, I say! Ladies of Toronto and Canada, this ones for you.

And, the boys cringe.

Topic of the Day: The Morning After Pill or Plan B

As of 2005, the Morning After Pill (.75mg of Levonorgestrel) was approved for over the counter sales. Though Canada is the 34th country to approve Plan B OTC it continues to divide the public. Thankfully, in Canada, it is only debated and women's reproductive right continues to prevail.

What is it?

The Morning After Pill which is available OTC here in Canada is Plan B. Plan B is two particularly high dosages of the progestin only hormone, Levonorgestre, delivered orally 12 hours apart.

What does it do?

Plan B acts both to prevent ovulation or fertilisation and possibly post-fertilisation implantation of a blastocyst (embryo). Phew! What a lot of talk!

Well frankly you must take the pill as soon as humanly possible. It is still effective 72 hours after sex, however, the effectiveness is greatly diminished. So take it fast, not slow.

Where can I find it?

Drug stores across Canada and Clinics.

Is it easy to get?

Yes, walk in to the pharmacists counter. Suck up your courage, admit you had sex, accept everyone's doing it too and say "Can I have the Morning After Pill, please"? The pharmacist will take you aside and in 1 minute explain the side effects, will produce a little blue box and charge you $33 for it.

Planned Parenthood Clinics sell Plan B for less, how much? I don't know, I haven't called them yet. But, keep an eye out on this space, the information will come.

Side Effects?

Nausea, headaches, cramping... although, some women don't experience a single side effect, others experience them all. In the end, it's a small price to pay for peace of mind.

Saturday, November 11, 2006



From the celebrity stylists that brought you Gwen as Alice in Wonderland, a heart broken Italian countessa and of course the original... Gwen the ska chicklette, now check it out it's Gwen as the leader of the Aryan Nation!

What did you do with the Harajuku Girls, Gwen? Where are they? They might have been your "of the moment" accessory, but, I think the Japanese have feelings too!

Caught in the craze and workin' on a budget, keep an eye out for Fergie's debut as her usual troll-faced self rollin with a crew of cranky Bingo addicts... rubbing, grinding on her for good luck in between smoke breaks...

and Crystal Meth hits.

hot.

Forever the optimist, I wake up smiling regardless of the grey light filtering through my blinds. How could I not? The window is cracked open with cool air drifting into my room and I'm wrapped tightly in my favorite duvet.

And, I promise you, that duvet is impermeable to cold air.

Promise.

Now I'm basking in the afterglow of an amazing breakfast. I took all my favorite foods like English muffin, butter and garlic sauteed spinach topped with smoked salmon a poached egg and my killer hollandais sauce.

All from scratch, because you can make it better yourself.

Now I'm blogging, pleased that I don't have to do a thing today except vacuum, job hunt and blog.

Although, the ghetto cam is missing.

Tonight, off to El Mocambo to check out my boy Paul and his band, The Amber Room, then over to The Reverb to see my girls.

Don't forget it's Rememberance Day... Gotcha Poppies, Bitches?

Thursday, November 09, 2006


Happy Birthday, Erol!
Belated but not any less lovely!

More photos to come soon!

give a shout out to Brayden.

11% of my readers are from Korea
50% are lawyers in Toronto.

hawt.

Brayden, is a sensitive soul who likes to pick up women at AA meetings, be sarcastic on msn, and speak to Bloganistas he has never met in person. Overall, he's a good guy who although failed to stay online long enough to make a date, he did log on long enough to ask me to give him a shout out.

It is left to be determined that he's a girl friendly guy.
Right now he's E-Man.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Here's more of what you've heard already.
Britney is back to being hot.
K-Fed is the FedEx.

Britney filed divorce from the world's most expensive sperm donor on Monday. The FedEx was notified by text message just after a speech confessing his love for his wife and family on Canada's own MUCH MUSIC.

Wow, harsh.

If that wasn't bad enough, FedEx's debut album ranked #151 after it's first week of sales. That equals about 6,000 albums total sold! That's really shameful! If that wasn't enough of an insult upon injury, FedEx's upcoming performance in Chicago is being papered.

You heard me correctly.

Sales are so bad, HOB is giving tickets away for free.

Peace Federjerk.

I don't understand what a midterm election is and I really want to understand. Hey, if American's understand it then it can't be too difficult to learn, right?

har har!

Okay, enough jokes and on to further education! I bring you the US Midterm election explination, KC Style, yo!

In Canada, we have the Parliament. Number of seats equals the overall success of the party, a certain percentage of the seats equals a majority or minority government, but, always the party with the highest number of seats rewards the party leader with the crown jewel of Canadian Politics, the position of Prime-Minister.

Ah, c'est bien!

In the US, I don't understand. Midterm elections are on right now and my head is spinning, which only makes me want to understand it even more!!! How dare the Americans confuse me!

Midterm elections are like the returning menstrual cycle of the US politics. It comes and goes whether you're ready for it or not every two years and fall on the first Tuesday of November on even years. It's arrival is highly anticipated, and if all goes well then you can breath a huge sigh of relief and go back to life without a pregnan-Republican scare.

If on the occasional chance, things don't turn out as it was supposed to, and voters find themselves nursing a government they weren't prepared to be burdened with. Well, they're left to see the politician's reign to term and often without any help from the President. But, like an unwanted child demanding attention from a reluctant father, these elected folks can give El Padre Presidentito a whole lot of headaches.

Why? Because, midterm elections have no impact on ousting the President. They aren't a Presidential election, they are a midterm election, silly! Presidents are elected every 4 years. But, those 36 individuals voted in midterms have a voice and will work hard to be heard and make change.

weee.

Well, this is what happened this year: Democrats have won the majority of state governorships and US House seats since 1994. The Democrats win majority! Wee... time for change.

Does that make any sense?

Got home from the funeral, had a bath, made some care kits, gave them out, came home, started to blog and now I'm just waiting for some human contact.

A day where the only option you have is to reflect on your own mortality. Then when the day comes it's only how you lived your life and the positive impact you left behind that matters.

Your immortality.

We can live our entire lives trying to leave a legacy and when it's all over, no one cares. You lived your life for all the wrong reasons.

Where is everyone?

Welcome to Karmacake!
Where 11% of my readers are from Korea!

Korea is kewl

So why do you think people are homeless?
Governments provide welfare.
Region dictates good will to all men
And, one would expect that an individuals decentcy would want to reach out to help another human.

Reality is this:

Every year about 800 individuals are released from jail and immediately they will immediatly wind up on the streets of Toronto. This is a personal opinion, it's fact and will be the subject of a public forum at U of T on November 11th, 2006.

People without homes are committing crimes for shelter. What crimes are they committing and what crimes are being committed against them? Are jails the answer to homelessness?

It's such a saddening topic. That in a modern world we can't feed every hungry mouth, shelter every homeless individual, and just have everyone want to help others for a better world.

I was Miss Toronto and I want to change the world.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Intimidating?
Delivered like a broken record since I was a child.

Here's the thing, I'm not looking for excuses, reasons or some alibi like it was "meant to be" I just want to meet a guy I think is great, he thinks the same and that's it.

You see, I've come to realize that everyone else in the world has an interpretation of who I should be dating, and it's not necessarily the same as my own. So inevitably when I meet a new guy and I show my girls/boys they say the same thing "He's not cute enough", "too old", "too young", "not rich enough" and my favorite "You can do so much better" etc etc etc.

In their minds, I can never get it right.

In my mind, I always get it right.

So here's my wish list:
I go for kind spirit, interesting life, intelligent, hard working, culturally aware, ambitious, hard working and will eat my cooking. Essentially that guy that has the undeniable goodness of heart.

So far, those guys just never see me as the girl that likes them.

Until he told me that he's got a rat tail.

God has even revoked his stigmata.

But, the characters from Fubar have stepped in to salute his left nut.

Matt Pfaff.
You are special.
And, I'm an equal opportunity friend.
I still love you even if you have a handicap that encourages you to have a rat tail.

What is wrong with me?

The celebs are pimping it in full force to encourage voters to hit the mid-term polls and vote vote vote!

But, I don't care care care. Normally, I don't agree with individuals flaunting their celebrity to sway the opinions of voters. Although, in regards to the past few elections, US voters did such a terrible job when left to their own devices it's nearly a requirement.

Here's a good rule of thumb when following celebrity political endorsements:

You should vote for the candidate that isn't republican.
So simple isn't it.

Well, in remotely less boring news, Posh and Beckam are looking to take over the US. Becks was asked to play for an L.A. soccer team, while Posh is trying desperately to position herself as a fashion icon.

Posh's recently launched blog documents her life as a "fashion" icon, and has such thrilling behind the scenes footage of Posh shopping, trying on clothes and her maids dying all her clothes black. She also has released a companion book to help cure the world of all ills fashion and fashionable.

Thrilling.

Life changing.

Epic.

Almost as epic as those lines she needs to complete in order to keep herself skinny.
Unless, she's a sassy lil' frassy with bulemia.

Chapter 1

Children, remember the food guide is propaganda generated by big business and fatties. If you want to be fashionable, you also need to be thin. So disregard the guide that encourages you to eat insane servings of carbs. Why? Carbs make you fat. And, fat makes you unfashionable.

Ways to tell you are fat:
The only pair of shoes you can wear are crocs.
The size 2 dress fits snug.
You don't do crystal meth or cocaine as your main diet drug.

Chapter 2
Black is slimming.
We can never be too thin. Fatties might shout and say you're unreasonably thin and are anorexic. Don't listen to them, they are unfashionable. What you should do is ensure that every item in your wardrobe is black.
If it isn't, dye it.

Chapter 3
People as accessories.
When you are so thin and fashionable, your heart will turn to stone and you will lose the capability to love. But, that doesn't mean you can't have a man on your arm. A sexy man by your side is iconic. You never have to live in the same home, location or hemisphere, however, if he wears a wedding band that you placed there, he is yours.

If you do happen to fall in love and want to have children. Consider hiring a surrogate mother, less stress and havoc since you can let another woman worry about it. Let her have the morning sickness, the ever expanding belly, the parasitic human feeding off of her blood and the episotomy. You can have the martinis and never have to relinquish your "prescribed" medications.

Monday, November 06, 2006

Personal style is such a touchy subject. Some people have it and some people don't. And, you can easily determin if you have good style or bad style by asking yourself one question:

Ladies: Which shoe will you choose to sport on a casual cool date of coffee and ice cream by the boardwalk?
(Yes, there is an incorrect answer)


Do not be fooled. Regardless of whether the shoe is inconspicuous black, it does not make it appropriate to wear in public.
If you chose the upper shoe, you are correct! Congratulations, you have the sense to recognize the lower shoe as inconvenient by-product from a standard tire manufacturing process.

There are dangerous times ahead! Decisions much more difficult than the aforementioned will dot the landscape of your Fashionscape, and you will be alone to make the final correct decision.

The burden is great.
The reward greater.

Those acting as representatives for "Fashionably Comfortable," a lobby group that has attempted to infiltrate the closets of all fashionistas, yet again! Though I have yet to prove of their existance, we all are familiar with their peverted philosophy is that fashion should never hurt, and that Payless should be the only shoe source.

So women of the world, if you are tired of choking on the fumes of Payless' cheap vinyl shoes, stand up!
If you preserved your fashion integrity regardless of the intrduction of UGGS -Bitches, stand up and salute your good taste!!

Recently, the offensive brand of gardening clogs that have appeared on the feet of women in public! Like beers under 6% alcohol are reserved for the elderly, the infirm and children, I say so should these shoes be reserved for the elderly, infirm and infantile!

Informants back home have shared that An International ChicTard agency (Fashionably Comfortable) unleashes their whoreanus "Crocs" like a swarm of ravenous locusts on the shoe collections of Maritimers. How can I sit back and idly let this happen? I thought their appearance in Yorkville this Spring/Summer was a prank for Juste Pour Rire Gags, and now I know, I was wrong.

But, this battle is personal now. The integrity of my home province is at stake, and the people need me! I must address this in my teensy piece I'm writing for the December issue of The Buzz.

If you own a pair of these rubberized foot shells please quickly deposit them in the recycling bin as indicated by the shoe's safe disposal techniques.

What other shoes are deemed too hideous to wear by the sane? Try UGGS, platform flip flops, chunky soled loafers (circa 1996), and of course gardening clogs worn outside your home.

Remember, even if there's a place for you to put your foot in doesn't mean you should.


It's hard work being the posterchild for single women in the city!
Lavalife's Click at a Flick is getting lots of press, and Jax and I are front and center keeping it real for the city's hotties.

We are the Flick n' Click girls, coming to a Lavalife party near you!

If you want to read the entire article, just rock on over to The Toronto Star and check it out.

I went to one event, but the mileage seems to be holding out for way more exposure then I was prepared for. Any comments, Jax?

2006 is a traumatic year of beginnings and endings.
Over the weekend, news quickly spread of my brother-in-law's father's passing.

He was a gentle man, a good man, and a man I looked forward to seeing at those brief family events dotted throughout the year. He was adored by his grandchildren, and admired by all. A lovely man who will be greatly missed, but he will never be forgotten.

May he guide his family from above.

Rest in Peace.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

This guy likes the nutcracker a scary amount.

Like a stay home and copy the slick moves of David Silver (the on air personae of Brian Austin Green) the musically apt, rockstar homie of the Belvery Hills High school sophomore crew. And, then comb brill cream through his thining mullet and put on his so 80's blazer and rock out in his miami basement. Like that type of big scary in love with the Nutcracker Suite.

This dude is Miami Vice bringing the classic hits of Tchaikovski to the youth by presenting it in a cool and new way. YAH!

He is keepin' it real and if you can deal with listening the entire title track you'll hear the creepy old man speak from beyond the grave. "Go to my website and buy my cd, Nutcracker Suite Electroneeque. Peace"

It was a song that tripped me out and made me feel scared to be alone locked in my apartment.

You want to listen to the single most wacked out song by a dedicated miami cheesola 80's sitcom sexy man neighbour role character begging you to visit his website. Then you just need to click here!
Mad Nutcracker!
Nutcracker Suite
Electronieek!

Friday, November 03, 2006

I HAVE TICKETS FOR BORAT!
Are you jealous?

I bet you are.

ha
ha
ha

Thursday, November 02, 2006


When I was knee high to a grass hopper, I took art lessons at Lefurgy Cultural Centre in Summerside, PEI.

I painted pictures of grasshoppers, ladybugs, and the occasional smiling flower, I was really quite prolific as an artist during my early years, roughly around 6-9 years of age. My teacher, Ardis, who I mistakenly called Artist. In my defence, it was apt and not so far from her real name.

Well, I came across this on the online edition of my home newspaper, and there she is, lil' ol' Ardis proudly displaying her extensive collection of Colbalt Blue dining ware.

Bless Summerside's news for having a little old woman on the front page displaying her collection for all to enjoy. That's what Toronto is missing, that sweetness and charm that's inherit in a small town.

There just isn't enough people in the world who are excited by tea kettles and coffee creamers.

I have been in love many times, but, there's only one man -ONE MAN!!- who I have been in love with since I was 14.

He's never disappointed me. Never let me down. And, even though he has a commitment problem I keep on coming back for more.

He's dangerous.

He's James Bond, and now that Pierce Brosnan is out and Daniel Craig is in, I'm falling in love all over again. The first time since Sean Connery is there a gent that's approaching the role with a sensitivity I crave!

Oh, I'm so thrilled I cannot wait!
Borat tomorrow night.
Casino Royale on the 17th!

I wonder if I'll ever get a chance to act and be a Bond Girl to Daniel Craig's Bond.

This was a lame post. I'm losing my punch

Well, I do.

After a movie I open my mouth. Obviously, if you know me, this isn't coming as any great surprise. But, what came out was a waterfall of words kissed with overtones of giddy excitement and enthusiasm. You see, there are a few guys that I have my eye on, but, one in particular is intriguing me in a way I can't really describe.

With that said, the conversation was a monopoly and the language was gossip.
My gossip.

I can't take back the words that I said. I violated my personal challenge to resist devaluing another human being. I couldn't help it, I wanted to my friends everything I could. The guy is really sweet!

How do I right this? I can't just confess without:
A) Sounding Insane B) Admitting I think this person is special and C) Admitting that I spoke about them behind their back.

So I blog, in the only way I can confess in a semi public fashion.
I'm sorry.
I didn't say anything bad, just it was inappropriate.
I hope this can right the inbalance I placed in this universe!

Have you noticed that so many people are becoming celebrities and how seemingly easy it is to catch that star?

So, being a celeb is the new black.

And, the coolest woman to take on this trend, is none other than one of my bestest friends from Childhood, M'selle Julie Audette!

Julie, my beloved friend and longtime personal nutrition coach, has offered me the best of her services free of charge since she began. Now she's taking her message to move deserving folks with her own tv show on Canal. Her friendly no nonesense approach to good health through good nutrition will be seen by all. Who can resist her adorable French charm, good looks and honest intelligence? I can't!

She's helped to tackle head on my food worries and has been one of my best friends since we met in High School! So I wish you all the best on your new show, and I'll be there to share it with English Canada!

Oh and btw, Dodgeball is the new afterwork volleyball. I kid you not.
Click Here!

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Yes, Madonna can squish me if she so chooses, but, I was compelled to blog about this quote on her recent adoption:

"I have people say to me when I'm walking down the street, 'Why did you adopt a black child?' I don't dignify their question with a reply. But there is a lot of racism in the world. I think that's underneath a lot of people's prejudice about me adopting David. A lot of people have a problem with the fact that I've adopted an African child, a child who has a different color skin than I do. I'm not going to buy into it and neither are my children. So I don't worry about it. I don't live in a white world. I live in THE world. And my children are exposed to all cultures and all races and many belief systems."

- Madonna tells the Today show's Meredith Vieira


Madonna, here's the thing, this is why people have a "problem" with you adopting an African child.

Angelina Jolie and Bradd Pitt have cornered and are the masters of that market. You come in, go on a mission in Africa to adopt a child and the world feels that it's a ploy to acquire some of attention directed to the Jolie-Pitt camp.

Maybe it's not true.
Maybe it is.

Of all the adoptions that happen, of all the mixed races, why do I feel like you are making a mountain out of a mole hill? I'm glad you notified me of the public's curiousity with your recent adoption, had you not mentioned it I would have missed it entirely.

I'm just saying.

My gut instinct tells me that your selfless act of reaching out to another human being is a shameful act of self promotion through which you overturn a selfless activity into another disposible copy cat trend.

If it was less about self promotion and more about assisting one of the world's youth, are you discriminating against the thousands of orphaned children across the United States? Why is David much more worthy of your attention then any of your local underserved youth?

Waiting lists?
Perhaps.

Any seemingly normal individual deserves to adopt a child, however, I question the authenticity of your intentions when you conduct television interviews discussing the said adoption. There is nothing discreet nor tasteful about pimping out the public's opinion on your recent adoption for publicity and promotion.

Your child isn't of a different race because...
*soft moral inspired theme music*
we're all apart of the Human Race.

*end scene*

Frothers = Friends who are like Brothers.

Guy's Girl = Karmacake

Skanky Bitches or Pussy Patrol = My click i.e. - The Sistahs from Different Mistahs

Magger = A partner who is so unattractive you need to entertain yourself with a magazine

Bagger = A partner so unattractive that you need to cover their head with a bag

Double Bagger = A partner so unattractive that you need cover both your head and their head with a bag. Just in case their bag rips.

Magger, Bagger, Double Bagger courtesy of my Dearest Frother Mark (Adventure Guy) W.

Chic-Tard = A fashionably inept child of the world.

Prince Edward Island, often over looked by many as this tiny out of the way hick province of Canada. Populated by fisherman, farmers and blue collar government employees, how can there be anything of note happen there?

Well besides being the birthplace of yours truly, P.E.I.'s Heart and Stroke Foundation recently approved the use of clot busting drugs for the province's new integrated stroke strategy.

The Numbers

1 stroke can equal up to billions of brain cells or neurons to die. Which not only sucks it also means for every 100 people have a stroke:

15 die
10 recover completely
25 have mild impairment
40 are left with moderate to severe impairment
the rest need care

Drain on the economy?
$2.7 billion PLUS emotional strain

Hit 55 and your odds double every 10 years

This new integrated stroke strategy authorizes emergency room staff to administer tissue plasminogen activator (tPA) to patients with ischemic stroke.

HUH!?!
*sigh*
Fret not my beloved readers, it's quite simple.
Those suffering from an a blot clot in the brain, as opposed to a hemorrage, get this new CLOT BUSTING superhero drug to loosen the clot and allow the necessary nutrients to reach the brain.
No clot means that no neurons die, no chance of death, no impairment, and no $2.7 billion dollar and emotional strain.

It's not a wonder drug, it's just science.

Of course, like all new stars on the scene, this drug travels with a rider. It can only be used within 3 hours of onset of symptoms and under no circumstance will it be applied during a hemorrhagic stroke, it'll make everything a lot worse and no one wants that. Therefore, to determin which stroke the patient is suffering from a Cat Scan is vital.

YAY! PEI!
Guess what? The first person to benefit from this new integrated strategy is a Summerside homeboy, Mr. Noye. Do I know him? No, I don't think so. But, my pop's crew at Prince County Hospital saved his life with the new strategy. When all was said and done he left the hospital with no signs of illness what so ever.

Had this been a different time and place, Mr. Noye might would assuradly not have been so lucky.

Toronto's a great place, but, Summerside is on the map today!

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

When I was young, but, I'm not a kid anymore.
I had an e-zine called "Made in Canada"
When I was doing a web search I came across an old review on Broken Pencil for my favorite University Passtime. The website is gone now, but, the memory lives on!

Xandra has disappeared.
Tyler is a proud parent and DJ in Calgary
Mathy is a personal trainer in Moncton
and I'm a celeb-in-wait in Toronto.

Made in Canada

e-zine, Nicola, Xandra, Tyler, Mathy, Fancy, http://members.xoom.com/Xancola/

Presented verbatim from the About Us page: "Made in Canada is an e-zine with a difference. We are 4 university students with different goals in life but with a shared interest in reporting a 'Real World' approach to the minds of young Canadians. We aren't serious, we aren't joking, we are that place in between. That place where if you forget to be Politically correct people don't mind and they go on. Where, come to think of it, if you say P.C. then people will ask you to clarify.... 'do you mean Politically Correct or Presidents Choice'? That place where everyone is equal and free to express their view on any issue without persecution or violations against the person. It is a real place, and we like it." Enough said. (DW)

reviewed in BP 9

This is Rollie.
Rollie was mistreated and abused by his former family. He now resides with my co-worker Jim and is weeks away from being the happiest little puppy this side of Kibbletown.

No, Kibbletown isn't a real place, it just sounded like a cute puppy utopia.

He's a charming Jack Russel Terrier who has a gorgeous face and apparently a temperment to match. I hear that his favorite activities include cuddling up with his master in a warm bed, and spooning?

If you want to give Rollie a happy new home, then please do connect with Jim via me @ karmacake@gmail.com

He's a doggie that wants to be happy, and you have all the love to give him.
Just a click away.
Do it.

Yesterday, while researching a fun night out for my friend, Erol. I came across the National Post's

The worthy 30: Toronto's most eligible bachelors

Being female, single and blessed with a wandering eye, I couldn't resist checking out a perennial top list of the Tdots most eligible hotties.

I do make it my business to know, just in case they come to a fundraising event, of course.

Regardless, I decided to create my own little list of the female hotties that are sweet, saucy and so adorable. The list has varying degrees of wealth, others more cash than others and some more chutzpah than others. But, in the end, they are all hotties who can think on their toes and make a party an event.

In no particular order, I present to you the Karma's Babe-List 2006! A small homage to my bestest friends.

Let's start with...

JAX!
Sassy and carefree, this free spirited Scorpian lass was
recently outted as "Single" on CityTV's coverage of Lavalife's Click at a Flick.

She takes more showers than anyone else I know, goes mad for drum n bass, and even
though she refuses to eat meat I still think she's kind of normal. Regardless of her penchant for wearing cake on her face instead of eating it. Licking it off WAS NOT an option.

Rich or Hot: Hot
Perfect date: One that doesn't include geeks.


SARAH!
One of the newest crew members to my circle of girls. Sarah has soulful eyes and a heart of gold.
This former model currently is a talented make up artist efficinado and artist by nature. She can mix a wicked drink due to years as a bartender in a busy downtown
resto.
She keeps all of her item
s in tidy little bundles in her room in an organizational masterpiece that marvels the best of us.
Sarah's adored by all who meet her and her overwhelming capacity to love all of God's creatures great and small means she can see the good in someone, ev
en if no one else can.

Rich or Hot: Sarah loves those who love her back. So I'll say "RICH, HOT, AND FUNNY!"

Perfect Date: Eating dinner with a gent who reveals that not only is he rich, hot and funny, he also has an obsession with kippers and balsamic vinegar.


FIONA-KINS!
With a flair for the nicknames and an ever present empathetic nature means her heart will not rest
until she has spread a ray of sunshine into everyone's lives.

Don't let the sweet exterior fool you! Wildly loyal she will fight for her friends and family until the end. And, the inner wild child allows her to drink more alcohol than is sane.

Though she's happily committed, I couldn't put a list together of babes and not have Fiona on it. She's a total hottie.

TARA!
Also known as the "Queen Bitch" Tara is the perfect mix of party, friend and responsible adult.
An aspiring fashion designer this Pisces always looks like a million bucks. One of the few people that I know that will never take a bad photo, ever.
Though, not, b
orn in Toronto, Tara exudes a sophistication that is rarely found in most Torontonians.

RICH or HOT?: I don't know... I can't get ahold of Tara. I'll say BOTH why settle?

Perfect Date: According to Astrology.com, Tara's perfect date would include...
Pisceans are interested in everything that isn't quite real: illusion and disillusionment, fantasy, drama, emotion, art, and spirituality. So any date that involves the arts, from painting together to attending the theater, will make your Pisces smile. Romance will be appreciated by this Sign, so try a beach picnic with wine and cheese or high-tea in a garden. Whatever you do, put a little magic into your date - creating the right mood will romance your Piscean more than any money you spend.

KARMACAKE!
I am the original double dip when it comes to being a geekazoid! Regardless of my mastery of all domestic arts (minus cleaning), I am happier to get others to do things for me than to do it myself.

A patron of the arts I'm disinterested in meeting men who can't handle my blog, or have more money then sense. Blessed with an extensive vocabulary I have also been cursed with terrible spelling and grammar, not to mention a need to pen my thoughts.

HOT or RICH: I'll settle for Employed and Mildly attractive.
Perfect Date: Eating, sitting on a beach at midnite with a chocolate shake and chips or a trip to the UK for fish and chips.
Or Paris for pastries!

MISSING FROM THE LIST: HELENA!
Soon to come!